


Darling Dearest

by Cryptid_nsfw (Midnightfalterings)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Fluff, M/M, Shiro (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, There's like minimal angst, Webcam/Video Chat Sex, camboy au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:20:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22703863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnightfalterings/pseuds/Cryptid_nsfw
Summary: So the man’s glasses sat at the tip of his nose as he pulled at the collar of his sweater, tilting his head to give his camera a full view of his pale, stretched out neck.“Any special requests? I’ll give my favorite barista first dibs as thanks.” His smirk had Shiro frozen in his spot.*RE-UPLOADED!Fic is originally from 2018, I'll talk more abt it in the notes
Relationships: Matt Holt/Shiro
Comments: 25
Kudos: 68





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I've been debating re-uploading this fic for a long while. I took it down originally because I wanted to make it an Adashi fic instead but I didn't have the heart to butcher it the way it needed for that to work.  
> I've got a long and rambling heart-felt essay in the end notes about why I'm putting the effort into editing and re-uploading this fic.  
> I'll be updating it as I go along with edits (hopefully about weekly or so)  
> But for now- Enjoy!

Shiro’s door closed with a quiet click.

Keith had gone home and it was late enough to settle into bed. His sweatpants sat loosely on his hips and his right arm sat on his desk, plugged into the charger.

He moved to his bed where his laptop lay open and waiting. It was Saturday night, a night of the week he always cleared an hour from his schedule and routine for exactly this reason.

_ DarlingDearest Has begun streaming _

The notification sent a thrill through him as he clicked on it, popping his headphones in.

It took a moment before the stream loaded up, the feed was grainy for a second before it focused on the man’s face.

He still had his glasses on and his light brown hair hung just at his shoulders, some of it swept behind an ear to keep it out of his face. He wore a soft looking oversized sweater, the neckline falling across his shoulders, leaving his collarbones in view. Purple was a good color on him.

“Thank you! It was a gift off my wishlist!” Darling was saying, the collar of the sweater between his fingers as he grinned.

Shiro ducked his head, blushing, despite no one around to see his reaction.

  
_ Baristababe: I’m glad you like it ;) _

“Of course it was you.” Darling smiled warmly at his computer screen. Shiro felt his heart clench. “You always pick the best things off my wishlist.” he let go off the collar, letting the fabric fall back against his chest. “I feel like a special thanks is in order, you spoil me.” Darling’s glasses slid down his nose as he winked at the camera.

_ Baristababe: That’s because you’re worth spoiling. _

Shiro could barely hear Darling’s laughter over the thumping of his heart in his chest.

“You’re sweet.” Darling reached forwards to adjust his camera, the viewer count having hit three digits, the new angle revealed the lack of pants under the sweater. The soft purple fabric pooled around the tops of his thighs, barely showing the shorts peeking out.

“This is officially the softest sweater I own.”

There was a question of how Darling’s day had been.

“Good! I got some good work done and I think I should be done with my project soon.” Darling beamed at the camera, obviously proud of himself.

Shiro had been watching Darling’s streams for a few months now, he’d developed quite the crush on the other man. He’d stumbled upon the channel after halfheartedly following a link Lance had sent him as a joke.   
After coming across Darling’s channel he quickly ran out of free videos and decided he had to subscribe for the streams.

It was actually Lance and Keith who had helped him sign up, his brother and Lance had laughed at him before putting their heads together to make him a good screen name and a “non creepy mccreeperson bio” as Lance had put it.   
“Some of the guys on this site have the creepiest bios.” Keith had turned around to tell Shiro as the older man paced behind the couch.

“Have you seen many creepy bios?” Shiro regretted the question as he watched his brother glance at Lance and snap his jaw shut before changing the subject.

Of course, the two of them hadn’t seen Darling. Shiro would never show them the man who got him to literally sign up for a cam show site. That didn't stop them from teasing him about it, though.

It was undeniably a crush. Attraction would be a simple appreciation of Darling’s body. This crush on the other hand was noticing his every quirk and hearing his laugh ring in Shiro’s ears when all was silent.

Of course it never helped that the majority of Darling’s fanbase requested something closer to the boyfriend treatment. The first half of his streams were always him talking about his week, leaving out personal details, but just enough to feel like you knew him. He’s made his brand well.

Darling had taken to keeping his glasses on for streams, ever since Shiro had told him he looked good with the glasses he had claimed it was easier to see the chat when he didn't have to squint.

So the man’s glasses sat at the tip of his nose as he pulled at the collar of his sweater, tilting his head to give his camera a full view of his pale, stretched out neck.

“Any special requests? I’ll give my favorite barista first dibs as thanks.” His smirk had Shiro frozen in his spot.

_ Baristababe: Whatever makes you feel good. _

Darling laughed at that, his head falling back as he grinned.

“You always say that. Such a generous guy.” Darling was already moving off screen, missing the flurry of comments from other regulars calling Shiro a sugar daddy. He wasn't exactly going to deny it but it wasn't exactly the case. Shiro simply liked seeing Darling’s smile.

“I haven’t tried this one out yet.” Darling said, coming back on screen, recently gifted vibrator in hand. He turned to the camera “I think you have a thing for purple.” he teased, referencing Shiro’s not-so-subtle color preference.

It was true. Shiro leaned towards purple gifts for Darling. Admittedly, it made it easier to tell when he was wearing Shiro’s gifts.

_ Baristababe: Guilty _

Darling’s giggle sounded like wind chimes to Shiro.

He had no idea how typing came so easy to him.

Shiro liked to consider himself a charming guy, he knew how to be polite. He could deal with customers and no one seemed to hate him after interacting with him.

Realistically speaking though, Shiro was no good with social interaction. Attractive people made him stumble over words and conflict made his knees shake.

Business owner Shiro was a completely different person than socially anxious Shiro.

Yet online he seemed to be able to talk smoothly and evenly. No one had to see his red face and shaking fingers.

Darling didn't have to know he was hyperventilating as he typed winking emojis.

It was a mild relief to know that Darling would never see how much Shiro blushed and stumbled.

The bottom hem of Darling’s sweater was held up between his teeth, displaying his torso and hips as he fucked himself on the purple toy.

Shiro watched through his fingers before he couldn’t hold himself back.   
He resigned to no more typing in favor of pulling at his pants and kicking them off.

His head hit the backboard of his bed with a soft thunk as he stroked himself in time with Darling’s movements.

On Saturday nights he slept best.

\---

Matt clicked his laptop shut quietly, slowly moving to stand. His legs wobbled a bit but it was nothing he wasn't used to.

He moved around sluggishly, cleaning up before stepping into the shower.

Saturday nights always left him a little worse for wear and sore. Sunday was his day for laying back and reading and doing nothing.

Pidge usually came around on Sundays and the two sat in silence while she tinkered with whatever robotics project she was working on. She never asked for help, not after last time.

Pidge and Matt quickly learned that asking the biochemist for robotics help only ended in burned eyebrows and singed hair. 

Matt pulled his wet hair into a ponytail as best he could, settling into bed.

As he was plugging his phone in he paused.

Matt had never paid attention to his viewers. He imagined that looking into who sat on the other side would simply result in feeling like he needed another shower.

Yet he felt an itch. A pull that he couldn’t shrug away. Curiosity was a funny thing like that, once the wonder had planted itself into your head it would sit there until you followed the path to the answers.

Down that path he went

_ User: Baristababe _ _  
_ _ A member for 5 months _

_  
_ _ Bio: _

_ Gay, He/Him, 27 _

_ Coffee store owner and part time body builder _

_ Ex-military _

Oh.

A young bodybuilder.

That definitely wasn’t the 50 year old creep Matt had been expecting.

That changed the context of things.

It changed the context of the gifts and the messages.

It made him stand out even farther.

Matt put down his phone and lay in bed, staring at the ceiling for a couple minutes.

The first time he’d ever had the urge to look into a viewer just happened to be only a year older than him.

He wasn't going to push his luck by looking into any other viewers. Not that he wanted to. Baristababe was interesting. He’d never made unwanted lewd comments, he usually stopped typing into the chat when the stream got sexual, and Matt now had a corner of his wardrobe filled with purple because of him.

It was interesting.

\---

“You realize you’re technically pining over a porn star, right?” Keith asked, mouth full as he waved his spoon at Shiro.

“I wouldn’t say porn  _ star _ . It’s a lot more along the lines of independent sex worker.” Lance piped up from the couch where he was playing something on their xbox.

“Thanks peanut gallery.” Shiro snarked over his shoulder at the other boy.

“Hey, my house, my rules!” Lance replied.

“I pay your salary.” That shut him up. Shiro turned back to Keith who was snickering into his yogurt.

Shiro could safely say that he’d never actually come over for the purpose of talking about his crush on Darling. Keith and Lance were just nosy enough that the conversation always ended up there, one way or another.

“Why don’t you just DM him?” Keith asked. Shiro blinked at him. “Oh my god.” Keith groaned, putting his yogurt cup down on the counter. “Private message him.”

Shiro froze in horror. The thought had never occurred to him but now that it was suggested...it sounded like a fate worse than death.

“Fuck no.” the words slipped out before he could think about it. “You saw me trying to talk to that hot health inspector. Talking to this guy would just be a disaster.” Shiro told Keith.

The hot health inspector incident was looked upon with great amusement for anyone who wasn’t Shiro. He had hit his head on a cabinet, slipped on a perfectly dry floor and then had punched himself in the gut with the corner of the counter. The poor man had assumed Shiro was acting odd out of hiding something and looked utterly confused as he handed Shiro the inspection’s A grade.

That was how Shiro handled talking to attractive people.

Not well.

Keith rolled his eyes.

“Okay well you’re either going to have to make a move or get over it.” His words were blunt in a way only Keith could achieve.

Shiro groaned and let his head fall into his hands.

He should know better by now than to expect actual advice from his brother. The only reason Keith and Lance had stopped dancing around each other from their mutual crushes starting in high school was due to Keith slamming Lance against a wall to yell his confession in the taller man’s face.

“Don’t know what to tell you, dude. He’s right.” Lance had come up from behind Shiro, reaching to grab some chips from the table. “I, personally, think you should slide up in those DMs.” Lance smirked. “Aye babydoll, how about you get that sweet ass over to my lap.” He lowered his voice, doing a poor impression of Shiro.

“I don’t sound like that.” Shiro grumbled into his hands as Keith and Lance snickered at each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, thanks for reading!  
> I'd like to start off by saying that this fic is /incredibly/ near and dear to my heart and to give a trigger warning for abuse and me massively oversharing-  
> When I started this fic I'd just escaped from a horribly abusive relationship, one of the worst experiences of my life, honestly. We'd met online and he was a really big Shatt shipper like me so we kinda clicked and everything went downhill from there. Long story short he's out of my life now but the scars are very much still there.  
> I wrote this fic to reclaim a ship I loved from reminding me of him and to prove to myself that even at my lowest of lows I could still write something beautiful and happy. This fic has...A lot of my very soul poured into it especially since I had no access to therapy at the time.  
> I'm doing better now, but this fic still holds an incredibly special place in my heart. Like a blanket fresh out of the dryer. So I'm resharing this because it meant a lot to me to write it and I hope it means something to the people who read it.  
> And to anyone who's in their low spot, you're worth love and recovery. You're worth the effort and you deserve joy and family.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt DMs first

Pidge let out a groan as a new connection short circuited. She fell backwards with a thud, her back hitting the couch by Matt’s feet.

Matt peered over the top of his book to raise an eyebrow at her.

“Rover keeps shorting out and I can’t figure out where the faulty connection is.” She explained, leaning her head back against Matt’s legs.

Matt took a long look at the robot laying on his coffee table.

“Have you asked mom about it?” He asked.

Colleen and Pidge had always been the tech half of their family while Matt and Sam had been more on the side of chemistry and biology.

“No. I was hoping I could surprise her by finishing this one on my own.” Pidge admitted, pouting at her older brother.

“Don't know what to tell you, Pidgeon.” Matt shrugged, giving her a sympathetic look. Pidge groaned dramatically as she hoisted herself up to keep working on Rover.

“What’s been going on?” She asked after a few minutes of silence. “You haven't told me any recent events in your life.” She kept her focus on Rover as she spoke.

Matt made a noise of apathy from behind his book.

“Not really anything.” He admitted. “Work is going fine. Still don't have a social life outside of you.” He teased. He paused, glancing at his phone. “I’ve been debating messaging some guy from online.” He said quietly. Pidge’s head shot up as she turned to him.

“A guy? What’s he look like?” Matt shrugged.

“Don't know. He’s online.” Pidge grinned at him.

“Do it.”

Which was how Matt ended up pulling up the site’s app to send Baristababe a message.

He didn't know what to say. Was this weird? Would he even want to talk to Matt.

_ Of course he would he’s been watching your streams almost religiously. He’s bought out almost half of your wishlist.  _ Matt told himself.

_ DarlingDearest: Hey! Thought I’d reach out privately to thank you for all the gifts <3 _

_ \--- _

Shiro watched the pen in his hand flip between his fingers idly.

He couldn't really be bothered to put in the energy to fill out paperwork.

“Morning, boss.” Lance called into his office as he clocked in.

“Morning, Lance.” Shiro replied, eyes still on the pen.

Sundays were an odd day. The morning rush came both earlier and later than planned, and the afternoon rush was replaced with a constant trickle.

Shiro sighed in defeat as the words on the paper danced around, illuding any form of the English language.

He figured he could at least help with the rest of the morning chores before the church goers came through.

“Allura, how’s stock?” He asked, coming through his office doorway.

The younger woman smiled brightly over the clipboard.

Her silver white hair was pulled into a high ponytail, Shiro often wondered how she kept it that color while also retaining every natural curl.

“Looking good! We might need to order more syrups soon though.” She reported. Shiro nodded and thanked her before heading to the storefront.

Voltron sat on a corner between a college, a church and a library. It was actually brilliant placement for a coffee store if you asked Shiro.

The college kids gathered in flocks for coffee before class or studying, the church women gathered for their book clubs and event planning. It was quite the lively shop.

All of Shiro’s employees were college kids, admittedly they were also Keith’s friends but he swore up and down that had nothing to do with getting them the jobs.

Allura, his trusted store manager, who worked her ass off for her Poli-Sci major. Shiro didn't actually know how she did it but she was a wonder in and of itself.

Lance, his brother's boyfriend and fellow astrophysics student was a crowd favorite. Everyone liked Lance. Girls would ask if he was working and church women emptied their coin bags into his tip jar.

Hunk was also a favorite. He had a bright smile and a blindingly sunny personality. It was a mystery how he came in bright eyed and bushy tailed for every shift with his engineering studies.

Pidge was a brilliant girl. She’d skipped a few grades and was currently the youngest employee at seventeen. Shiro had asked her why she worked there. From what he’d gathered from Keith her parents were well off, she had a father and brother working high ranks in the Garrison. She had stated that she had nothing better to do.

Shiro stood at the entrance to the storefront, watching the lights on the floor move as the sun rose.

Hunk looked about done sweeping and dusting, Lance had just finished counting the till, and Pidge or Keith’s shifts wouldn't begin for hours.

“Alright, open time.”

\---

Shiro looked up in surprise as his phone chirped. He reached across his desk and peered at his phone curiously.

_ 1 new message from DarlingDearest _

Shiro’s phone made a loud clattering noise as he fumbled it, failing to keep it from falling onto his desk.

His heart rate has skyrocketed upon reading the notification.

“You good?” Lance asked. He had happened to be passing Shiro’s office door on the way back from his break.

“Fine.” Shiro’s voice cracked. It came out as more of a squeak than a statement. Lance gave him a suspicious look but kept walking.

_ DarlingDearest: Hey! Thought I’d reach out privately to thank you for all the gifts <3 _

Shiro stared at his phone with wide eyes. Was Darling actually contacting him. He had to be dreaming. This was a dream. Or was it a nightmare?

Oh god.

He focused on breathing. He couldn't reply if his hands were shaking and he forgot how to breathe.

_ Baristababe: It’s nothing, thanks for putting up with me sending you so many gifts. _

Shiro’s head made a solid thunk as his forehead his his desk. This was why he didn't want to message Darling. He never knew what to say. He was going to end up making an idiot out of himself.

It was too early in the day for the gut wrenching stress of weighted social interaction.

_ DarlingDearest: Ha, I wouldn’t say “put up with”. But I am curious about the man behind them. _

Darling might as well have electrocuted Shiro.

He sat, frozen with wide eyed horror and excitement as he stared at the screen. Paperwork be damned.

_ Baristababe: Curious? About me? _

“Is he okay?” Allura whispered, peering around the corner at their tomato red boss.

“I have no idea. Do you think he’s having a heart attack?” Hunk asked from behind her, wringing his hands. Lance rolled his eyes from the other corner.

“Yo, Shirogane.” He called into the office. He held himself back from bursting into laughter as he saw the violent blush on Shiro’s face. “You message dream boy?” he asked.

Shiro shook his head, trying to remember how to breathe.

“He messaged me.” It was a squeak of a sentence, barely heard.

Lance’s laughter echoed through the entire store.

\---

Matt giggled quietly, book sitting in his lap as he typed on his phone.

“What’s that?” Pidge asked, an inquisitive eyebrow raised. It had been a long while since she’d seen her brother giggling into his phone.

“I messaged the guy.” Matt explained.

“And he’s giggle worthy?” Pidge asked, giving him a deadpan look. She had another hour before she had to be at work. Matt couldn’t say he fully understood her want to work through college but she’d been adamant that it would be good for her, so he didn’t question it.

“He’s awkward as hell.” he replied, watching the chat.

_ DarlingDearest: Of course. You seem interesting and I wanted to get to know you! _

_ Baristababe: Oh! I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to get to know you too. _

_ DarlingDearest: I’m glad! I gotta admit I was kinda surprised to find out you’re around my age. _

_ Baristababe: Surprised? _

_ DarlingDearest: Yeah, haha, I half expected you to be a middle aged creep. _

_ Baristababe: Ah, yeah. My brother wrote my bio for me to avoid my awkwardness coming through. I promise I’m not a middle aged creep. _

Somehow the conversation kept going. Matt’s book lay abandoned on the coffee table by Rover. Pidge had pulled her hair back into a bun, tongue sticking out as she made tweaks to Rover’s internal workings. Every once in awhile Matt would giggle or snort and Pidge would look up at him with an oddly knowing yet questioning expression.

She might be better with robots than people but she knew her brother. She could tell when Matt was forming a crush.

“Is he really that funny?” She asked after a long time, pointing at his phone with her screwdriver. “You keep laughing like he’s a fucking comedian.”

“Ha.” Matt snarked back at her, lightly kicking her shoulder. Pidge watched as his face softened when he looked at his phone. Oh boy. “He’s sweet. He keeps getting tongue tied and it’s cute.” Matt admitted. Oh boy.

Pidge rolled her eyes, turning back to Rover.

“Geez, He’s a human who isn’t eighty years old and he isn’t a complete douche.” She deadpanned. “He meets all your standards.” Pidge ignored the offended noise Matt made. She knew the exact face he was giving her. “Oh boy, does he breathe air too? Man, if he drinks water then I think he might be your soulmate.”

Pidge called out in surprise as Matt’s foot made solid contact with her shoulder. He launched himself up to tackle her.

“You little shit!” He hissed, there was no malice behind it. The siblings laughed as they fell over, Matt’s hand pushing into Pidge’s face as she made swings at his torso. “You take that back you gremlin!” Pidge squealed and struggled to get away as Matt began tickling her.

“Oh my god, you shitdick!” Pidge cried out, turning over to claw at the floor, laughing too hard to actually get away.

Matt settled for sitting on her back, reaching for his phone again, continuing to message Baristababe.

“Well, I hope your gay ass is happy.” Pidge muttered, resigning to her life as a carpet.

“I’m happy. My  _ ass _ will hopefully be happy soon.” Matt’s grin could only be described as ‘shit-eating’ as Pidge shrieked.

“GROSS!”

\---

“What’s this? Golden child prodigy late for her shift?” Keith teased as Pidge rushed out from the back room, pulling the Voltron apron over her head.

“Put a sock in it, Kogane.” Pidge snarked back, winding her ponytail into a bun as she reacquainted herself with the front counter. “Matt was being gross.” was an explanation in and of itself.

“What’s he up to this time?” Keith asked.

The store was near empty, as it usually was during the afternoon shift, which left Keith and Pidge alone to cause trouble. Not one of Shiro’s brightest scheduling decisions.

“Some guy online. He’s catching feelings.” Pidge whined. “He keeps going all soft and giggling at his phone. And who’s going to have to deal with the gross PDA? Me!” Keith snorted softly, crossing his arms at her.

“Wow. When’s the last time Matt had a crush?”

“Grad school.” Pidge replied. She looked genuinely concerned for her brother. It was something Keith could relate to. Watching Shiro pine, while humorous had proved emotionally taxing. An older sibling in emotional distress was the epitome of a bad time.

It was then that Lance came out from the back room, clocked out and apron put away. He said his goodbyes, swatting at Pidge’s bun as she squawked in protest. Lance chucked before leaning over the counter to place a soft kiss to Keith’s lips.

“See you at home, babe.” The two shared a lovesick smile as Lance backed away towards the front door.

The shop was quiet after Lance left until Pidge turned to Keith.

“Like that shit. I don’t think I can handle Matt doing that mushy shit in front of me.” She told him. “I barely survived his last relationship.”

Keith shrugged. Pidge whined about his and Lance’s affectionate displays but her smiles at the couple and encouragement to end the mutual pining made Keith think she didn’t actually mind.

“Hey, maybe you’ll actually like this guy.”

“Doubtful.”

\---

_ DarlingDearest: So, how’s your day going? _

_ Baristababe: Good! I just got out of work, letting my brother close up shop tonight..and well, you messaged me. So my day’s been pretty good. _

_ DarlingDearest: You’re such a charmer. A man after my own heart. _

_ Baristababe: Is that the way to your heart? Compliments and gifts? _

_ DarlingDearest: ! You know too much! o///o _

_ Baristababe: I’d argue that I don’t know enough. Tell me more about the way to your heart ;) _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So once a week seems to work well as an update schedule. For those who are nervous about reading chapter-by-chapter fics  
> 10.5 chapters are done I'm just finishing up chapter 11 so it'll definitely be finished lol  
> I've really, really enjoyed everyone's comments and I'm so happy people are liking the story <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A name to the face and a name to the voice.

The week progressed like this. Shiro was glued to his phone. It sat on his desk, face up and within reaching distance.

It would barely buzz before it was unlocked, messaging app up and a giddy 27 year old reading them like a 6th grade girl reads love notes in her locker.

Everyone had noticed the change. Shiro seemed less tired, he bounced when he walked and his smile reached his eyes.

Keith could see his brother breathing easier. If possible he seemed more confident. More willing to take up space.

“You know I love your brother. But this is...slightly terrifying.” Lance whispered as he watched Shiro practically dance around his kitchen cooking after inviting the two over for dinner.

“It’s cute!” Keith was beaming. “He looks like he actually slept.” There was a look of youthful wonder in Keith’s eyes as he watched his brother hum to himself.

“Guys. He’s so funny. He keeps making snarky comments and it’s so great!” Shiro gushed as his phone chirped. “He’s teaching me about memes!”

Keith’s smile dropped.

“Ah fuck.” Lance snickered at his boyfriend’s exclamation. “Shiro and memes are a bad combo.” Keith muttered out of the side of his mouth. Lance pushed at his arm.

“You just learned how to use reaction images, shut up.” Lance teased.

“So!” Lance turned his attention to Shiro as he spoke. “Does Mr. Dream-boat have a name?” Lance watched as Shiro paused.

“Um...We haven't actually exchanged names yet.” He admitted. “We - uh…” Shiro’s face flooded with an alarming shade of red. “We’ve just been calling each other darling and babe.” His back was turned and his voice was barely audible.

Lance and Keith shared a look.

“Oh my god that’s fucking adorable.” Keith’s eyes were wide as he metaphorically picked his jaw up off the ground.

“Were you like this?” Lance asked, waving a hand in Shiro’s general direction.

“Yes.” Shiro answered for Keith. “Keith flopped on every surface available claiming he’d found the love of his life.”

“Traitor.” Keith hissed under his breath.

Lance and Shiro burst into laughter.

The night went on, the subject diverted from Shiro’s crush to current events and the couple’s plans for after graduation.

It had taken a long few years for Shiro to talk Keith out of a military course, and it seemed to be for the best. After their father passed and Shiro was honorably discharged he would wade through hell itself to keep Keith out of active service.

Shiro smiled as he watched Lance and Keith bicker from the other side of the table, seeing the two of them in comfortable domesticity gave Shiro a bittersweet feeling.

He was happy for his brother. He’d never wanted anything more for him. From the moment Shiro was handed the bundle of blankets and told he had a half-brother he knew he’d do whatever he could to get Keith here. Happy.

But there was a lead weight in his stomach, the loneliness creeping around and through the sides of his vision. A violent feeling of emptiness and deep sadness.

He hated it.

He’d been shoving this feeling to the back burner for years now. It was only then that it came crawling back in. With Keith moved out and Shiro having to confront his empty apartment day after day, laying down in a too big bed night after night.

Shiro tried, but his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.

\---

_ DarlingDearest: Actually, I’m a scientist. The cam show is a side gig. _

_ Baristababe: A Scientist? I wouldn’t expect a scientist to need a side gig. _

_ DarlingDearest: Ha, it’s less out of need and more of...a self esteem boost I guess? _

_ Baristababe: I can guess having hundreds of viewers does the trick. _

_ DarlingDearest: That part actually surprised me! I was expecting maybe 20 people if I got lucky. _

_ Baristababe: I’m actually somewhat surprised you aren’t more popular. Have you seen you? _

_ DarlingDearest: I’m literally the definition of a nerdy twink. _

_ Baristababe: I fail to see how that’s a bad thing. _

_ DarlingDearest: Ha! I see where your personal preferences lie. _

_ Baristababe: Hey, a guy’s gotta have a type. _

_ DarlingDearest: Very true. _

_ Baristababe: Can I...ask what yours is? _

_ DarlingDearest: My type? _

_ Baristababe: Yeah. _

_ DarlingDearest: Oh god it’s been so long since I’ve dated anyone. I think at this point I’m more attracted to personality. Where I am in life now I think I’d just want a guy who’s nice and funny. If he’s attractive then that certainly doesn’t hurt. _

_ Baristababe: Honestly a sweet, funny guy plus a nap sounds real good. _

_ DarlingDearest: I know, right! I feel so old but I just want a good book, a glass of wine and a back rub. _

_ Baristababe: I’ve been told I give amazing back rubs. _

_ DarlingDearest: Oooh. But do you have a book recommendation and a bottle of wine? _

_ Baristababe: Those are easily acquired. _

_ DarlingDearest: Oh, ~swoon~. My dream man. _

\---

Matt smiled softly at his phone, picking it up to look at the new message notification. A small laugh escaped his lips.

A Monday morning, two weeks after he’d started talking with Baristababe.

It was safe to say he officially had a crush.

He still didn’t know the man’s name but he was getting to know a lot about him.

He owned a coffee shop.

He had been honorably discharged from special forces due to an injury when he was 25.

He had a little brother in college.

He was incredibly sweet and charming, even if his awkwardness and uncertainty seeped into every message he sent.

Matt giggled quietly, covering his mouth, at the newest reply. The two had been swapping sibling stories from childhood.

Baristababe was telling Matt about a particular instance when his little brother, barely seven years old, embarrassing him in front of a middle school crush.

“Well good morning to you too Mr. dopey grin.” His colleague stuck her head through the door. Ezor was grinning brightly, her bright pink ponytail falling to the side as she raised an eyebrow at him. “Who’s that?” She asked, nodding to the phone in his hand.

“A guy.” Matt couldn’t keep the smile off his face. He was biting into his lip to get it to go away but to no avail. Ezor squealed, stepping into his office to halfway sit on his desk and give him her best ‘I want every detail’ face.

“Met him online. We’ve been talking for about two weeks now. Well...directly. We’ve had indirect contact for the past five months.” Matt rested his head against his hand as he spoke, spacing out as he began to gush.

It was a good five minutes before he refocused his vision, realizing Axca was also in the room now, standing behind Ezor with an eyebrow raised while her girlfriend was positively beaming.

“Wow. He reeled you in quick.” Axca commented, looking down her nose at him.

“What’s his name? Where’s he from? What does he do?” Ezor began rapid firing questions, ignoring her girlfriend as she grabbed Matt’s hand, practically vibrating with excitement.

Matt blinked in surprise, mouth hanging open before his brain kicked into gear.

“Uh...We haven’t actually exchanged names yet. I don’t know where he’s from and he runs a coffee shop and is a part-time personal trainer.” He tried to answer Ezor’s questions to the best of his ability.

Ezor frowned, scowling at her coworker.

“You don’t know his name?” she asked, removing her hands from Matt to adjust her glasses. Matt flinched under her gaze. Pidge had chastised him for the same reason. Axca scoffed and rolled her eyes.

“Matt. Get his name. He probably wants yours and he’s too chicken shit to ask.” Axca told him, Ezor nodded along.

Matt cast a long look at his phone, glancing back at his two coworkers.

Back at his phone.

Back to his coworkers.

Back to his phone.

He reached out and unlocked the device, typing out a message.

\---

Shiro hit his head on the low hanging cabinet in an attempt to get to his phone. Hunk gave him a weird look from where the young man was taking pastries out of the oven.

_ DarlingDearest: Okay, this is going to sound really weird cuz we’ve been talking for weeks now and you can say no if you want but I was wondering if you wanted to actually exchange names. Cuz as cute as your username is...referring to you as Baristababe is a little weird. _

Shiro nearly jumped out of his skin, ignoring the second worried look. He turned to lean against the counter, typing his reply.

_ Baristababe: Of course, makes sense. As cute as my brother finds it that I call you Darling, he asks about your name. _

_ Baristababe: But anyways hello, I’m Takashi. _

_ DarlingDearest: !! Takashi is a cute name! Fits you. But Hi! I’m Matt. _

_ DarlingDearest: I was also not aware that your brother knew about me. >:3c Talk about me much? _

_ Baristababe: May I plead the 5th? _

_ DarlingDearest: You may not! If it helps...my sister and a couple of my coworkers have heard about you. _

_ Baristababe: Oh? So you talk about me too? _

_ DarlingDearest: Well, yeah. There’s a lot to talk about. _

_ Baristababe: Good things I’m hoping?? _

_ DarlingDearest: the best! _

Through his peripheral Shiro saw Keith entering the backroom to help Hunk.

“Are we sure he isn't dying?” Hunk asked quietly.

“Yeah, he’s just being gay.” Keith shook his head.

“But he...he’s abnormally red.” Hunk’s concern bled through his voice.

“This is just what he’s like when he has a big crush.” Keith assured him, glancing over at his brother.

“God, that’s worse than me.”

Keith burst out laughing. Hunk was right. At least Hunk had been able to steadily talk to Allura and Shay without bursting into flames. Shiro, on the other hand, did not possess that ability.

“His name is Matt!” Shiro blurted, looking up with a giddy smile on his face. “I have his name!”

“Wow. Congrats. Only took you two weeks.” Keith deadpanned and Hunk snickered.

Shiro pouted.

“He’s intimidatingly hot, how was I supposed to ask him for his name?”

Keith rolled his eyes so hard they ached.

Hunk was still snickering.

\---

_ DarlingDearest: So...I have a question. _

_ Baristababe: ?? _

_ DarlingDearest: Usually Friday nights are reserved for private shows. But I don't have an appointment tonight...so I was wondering if you wanted one. _

_ Baristababe: Do I want a...private show? _

_ DarlingDearest: You, of course, are not in any way required to say yes I just thought it might be something you would be interested in but I guess that’s a bit presumptuous I’m so sorry _

_ Baristababe: Oh god please don't apologize. I had to get the blood to leave my face. I’d actually really like a private show. _

_ DarlingDearest: You would??? Okay! Is 7 okay? _

_ Baristababe: 7 is perfect _

_ DarlingDearest: Awesome! I’ll see you then! ;) _

_ \--- _

Time moves at a snail's pace when you’re waiting on something. An odd phenomenon of only paying attention to the passage of time while in a state of anticipation. Despite time being an abstract concept we’ve built our entire lives around it, we’ve timed our lives and interactions on the ticking of hands on a clock.

In short, Shiro was dying and pissed at time.

His employees had all noticed his twitchiness. His finger tapped on his desk as his gaze was fixed intently on the analogue clock sitting above his office door.

No one had entered his office. The aura of impatience and irritation was spilling through the doorway like gas.

Shiro’s jaw clenched, he had only taken his eyes off the clock to reply to Matt, who was answering in short bursts, as though he were just as nervous as Shiro.

The second the clock struck six Shiro was out of his chair, coat in hand as he carved a path to the back door. He barely heard Pidge and Keith giggling mischievously as they called out goodbyes.

Shiro had probably broken the law in speeding back to his apartment but he couldn't really be bothered to care.

It had been a long time since he was this determined to see someone.

He arrived at his apartment at 6:15 which left a full 45 minutes of time inching by like a fucking lazy river.

Shiro didn't think his apartment had ever been more thoroughly dusted or vacuumed than after those 45 minutes of trying to fill his time. He took a step back, staring at his living room. It looked like an ad from a magazine. Keith wasn’t going to let him live that down if he saw it.

6:55.

Shiro scrambled to his room, flipping his laptop open while he put his arm on his charger and hopped around to get into his sweatpants and a t-shirt instead of his work clothing.

His computer pinged as he was sitting against the headboard, pulling the device into his lap.

_ DarlingDearest has invited you to a private stream _

_ Accept _ __ __ __ __ __ __ _ Deny _

Shiro had never hit a green accept button faster in his life.

The video window popped up, Shiro’s heart hammering in his chest.

Darling - Matt - was laid out on his bed, head resting in his hands and his feet in the air as he looked at the camera.

“Hey.” Matt’s voice was a light in the storm swirling through Shiro’s head. “Glad you could make it, Takashi.”

Shiro.exe stopped working.

He simultaneously thanked every star and cursed every god that he’d told Matt his first name.

_ Baristababe: Of course, I wouldn't miss it for the world. _

Matt’s smile was softer than the one Shiro was used to. Usually he grinned with confidence and mischief but tonight his smile was shy and sweet.

“Now, how quiet are you going to be in this stream?” Matt asked teasingly. Shiro laughed guiltily, trying to figure out what to tell Matt.

_ Baristababe: I mean, it does get a little hard to type when my dominant hand is out of order and my other hand is...you know... _

That was one way of saying it.

Matt’s eyes widened a fraction.

“Oh! That explains that.” He let out a small laugh before leaning forward, he appeared to be looking through settings in his browser. “Should I turn on voice chat?” He asked. Shiro froze. Oh shit. He was just handed the option of a voice to voice conversation on a rainbow platter.

_ Baristababe: That should work. Let me grab my headphones so I have a mic _

Matt nodded, biting his lip through a smile. He flipped through a few settings while Shiro grabbed his headphones from his end table and plugged them in.

“Okay. Voice chat is on.” Matt sat back a little, returning his hands to his face.

“Testing, testing.” Shiro teased, laughing quietly.

Matt froze.

For a second Shiro was worried the feed had frozen but Matt was still blinking.

“Oh. I wasn’t expecting you to sound like Hercules.” He murmured quietly. Shiro burst out laughing.

“What?” He asked through his laughter.

“Y-you...Hercules was like one of my first childhood crushes and you sound like him!” Matt was blushing, he let his face go so he could bury it in his blanket, muffling his words.

“So I sound like your childhood cartoon crush?” Shiro had to admit this development thoroughly amused him.

Matt picked his head up to scowl at the camera.

“Laugh it up, Takashi, it’s my gay ass suffering over here.” his scowl turned to more of a pout.

“I’m not making fun of you! It’s just cute!” Shiro replied, trying to stomp down the laughter still coming through in his voice.

Matt’s face morphed into a wicked grin.

“So I’m cute?” He asked, framing his chin with one hand as he tilted his head. His hair fell over half his face as he blinked innocently at the camera. His smile grew as Shiro made a choked noise.

“Fuck, Matt. You’re gunna kill me.” Shiro whined.

“Oh?” Matt questioned, thumb tracing his lower lip. “How am I killing you, Takashi?” He asked, his voice had taken on a new tone. The soft look in his eyes remained but the rest of his face made Shiro feel like he was about to be eaten alive.

“Jesus Christ.” Shiro’s voice came out in a small whimper as Matt laughed. He moved to sit up, legs crossed as he pulled the camera up to his height. Shiro made another choked noise as he realized Matt was only wearing a t-shirt and very short boxer briefs.

“You know...I knew you fluster easily but this is the first time I’m hearing it.” Matt smirked, letting his hands fall to play with the hem of his shirt.

Shiro felt his mouth growing dry.

“You’re lucky I’m not standing up.” He laughed nervously. “Usually my knees buckle and I fall over when I get flustered.”

Matt’s snort of laughter echoed in Shiro’s ears.

“I would actually pay to see that.” Matt covered his mouth with one hand as he laughed. There was a pause as the laughter died down. “Speaking of..” There was a pink blush dusting his cheeks. One Shiro had never seen him display for the camera. “This is your private show...was there anything you wanted?” He asked, voice shy.

Shiro gaped for a second, he’d be content enough just talking to Matt that he’d forgotten the purpose of the stream.

“I...uh...Have any toys you haven’t tried out yet?” Shiro wasn’t sure just how vast Matt’s collection was but it was worth asking.

Matt’s face lit up before he scrambled off his bed and out of the frame. The sounds of rummaging through his room could be heard. In a flurry of movement Matt flung himself back onto the bed, grinning giddily.

“I don’t know if you remember buying this.” He started, pulling out a black dildo. One of the first things Shiro bought off his wishlist. “I-uh, I’ve used it off camera but never for a show.” Matt explained, running his hand along the length. “Is this okay?” He asked, looking up into the camera.

Shiro nodded before realizing Matt couldn’t see him.

“Y-yes! Absolutely!” Shiro replied, watching as Matt’s grin grew as he set aside the dildo to bring his hands back to the hem of his shirt.

Shiro watched as Matt pulled the shirt over his head, tossing it somewhere off screen, revealing the expanse of soft skin. Skin Shiro had dreams about kissing every inch of. Collar bones Shiro wanted nothing more than to mark up.

“Hey Takashi…” Matt sounded hesitant as he spoke, chewing at his lip.

“Yeah?” Shiro asked, worry lacing through his voice.

“Do...Do you think you could talk to me. Like, it doesn’t have to be dirty talk I just like your voice and it would be nice to hear-” Matt cut himself off before his rambling could continue.

“Of course, anything you want, Matt.” Shiro took a deep breath. He wasn’t good at talking, but if Matt wanted to hear his voice then his voice he would use. “Have I told you how pretty you are?” Shiro grinned as the blush immediately took over Matt’s face. “Because you’re gorgeous. I’m always awe-struck every time I see you. You’re perfect.” Matt looked down, blushing. Shiro stuttered slightly as he noticed the bulge in Matt’s underwear. He found it hard to believe that Matt was that attracted to his voice, but the evidence was clear.

“Turns out your compliment jab was accurate.” Matt laughed softly, referencing the first day they began talking. Shiro swallowed heavily as Matt palmed himself through the fabric.

“So you like when I call you pretty?” Shiro was amazed his teasing came out as even as it did. He felt jittery and much too overheated.

Matt nodded, grinding his hips into the palm of his hand.

“Good. Because you look so good like that.” Shiro continued, he had no idea where any of this came from. He’d never been good at dirty talk, but compliments...compliments he could do.

Matt made a whining noise, his free hand grabbing the sheets beneath him.

Shiro stumbled, falling silent as he watched Matt all but rip his underwear off and turn around, reaching around his bedside table.

Shiro got a fantastic view of the curve of Matt’s ass.

“Shit.” Matt looked over his shoulder to give his laptop a questioning look. Shiro hadn’t meant to swear out loud. “Sorry. You just...you have a nice ass.” Shiro admitted, blushing as Matt grinned, popping his hip off the bed to better display it before he fully turned around.

“Glad you like it.” Matt laughed quietly as he revealed a bottle of lube.

Shiro gulped.

“You doing okay over there, big boy?” Matt raised an eyebrow, his smile turning mischievous.

“Fine.” Shiro squeaked, cursing his voice for choosing that exact moment to break.

Matt propped himself up on his knees, making a show of popping the cap to the lube open.

“Stay with me, Takashi. It’s no fun if you aren't watching.” He tilted his head, his expression downright cruel.

Cool.

Power bottom.

Matt was a total power bottom.

Shiro was going to die.

Shiro whimpered, sinking a little farther against his headboard.

He was so hard it hurt.

Matt was pouring lube on his own fingers, looking up to make eye contact with the camera as he sunk the first finger in.

“Fuck.” The word was barely picked up by the camera mic, but Shiro heard it.

“Matt, you look amazing.” Shiro told him, slowly reaching down into his sweats. He couldn’t watch any longer without doing something about his own erection.

Matt bit his lip as he worked a second finger in, and eventually a third.

Shiro watched intently, stroking himself slowly, he wanted to last as long as Matt did.

Matt gave his camera a look, eyes half lidded as he pulled his fingers out and reached for the dildo.

“Is it inappropriate to say I’d rather have this be you?” Matt asked, showing off the dildo, he was smirking but there was a hint of shy apprehension.

“I’d rather have it be me too.” Shiro admitted.

Matt nodded, smiling to himself.

“Well, before I say anything mushy and grossly affectionate I’m going to shove this up my ass.” Matt interrupted his own train of thought, opening the lube again.

The sentence drew a laugh out of Shiro.

“Sounds like a plan.” He agreed as he watched Matt coat the dildo and line himself up over it.

Matt’s hair fell in front of his face as he leaned forward on one hand, other hand holding the dildo in place as he slowly lowered his hips.

Shiro groaned at the view, hand tightening on his own dick.

“Fuck, you look good.” He murmured, watching as Matt looked up through his hair, blush across his cheeks and a soft smile on his face.

It took a while for Matt to get himself fully seated but when he did he let out a sigh, leaning back up.

“Shit.” He groaned, eyes closed as he took a moment to breathe.

“You are so beautiful.” Shiro told him, looking over him.

Honestly, the view would be better in person rather than over the screen of a laptop but Shiro would take anything he could get.

“Takashi…” Matt whined.

“Go on, babe, move.” Shiro encouraged. Matt whined again, lifting himself up before grinding back down. He let out a loud moan, head tilting back.

Matt cursed under his breath, bouncing on the dildo. Shiro let his head hit the headboard, hand moving in time with Matt’s hips.

Shiro found himself rambling with compliments, telling Matt how pretty he looked, how good he sounded. He liked watching Matt blush.

“Takashi!” Matt moaned again, free hand going to his dick. He bit his lip, whimpering with the dual stimulation.

Shiro let out a low groan.

He’d seen Matt like this countless times but this was...different.

All of Matt’s attention was on Shiro. This was  _ for him _ .

There was no one else seeing this, hearing this.

Shiro let himself believe Matt was even thinking about him.

“T-takashi...I’m close.” Matt whimpered, looking up at the camera. His legs were shaking from holding him up.

“Me too.” Shiro told him, eyebrows scrunched together as he burned this image of Matt into his mind. “Come on, Matt.”

Matt gasped, it only took a few seconds until he was coming, Shiro’s name on his lips.

Shiro came soon after from the sight.

“Fuck.” Shiro panted, eyes screwed shut.

“Holy shit. I need a nice hot bath after that.” Matt murmured from where he’d face planted into the sheets.

Shiro chuckled, staring at the image on his computer screen fondly.

“That sounds like a good idea.”

Matt lifted his head from the sheets to smile, a soft and sweet smile. One that made Shiro’s heart clench.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk if yall like fire emblem but I'm working on a couple Ashedue fics while I edit this.  
> But yeah...another week of gay shiro here we are.  
> I also changed which Psued this was on cuz I...forgot I had a dedicated nsfw Psued...


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Numbers exchanged - something is brewing

Shiro had Matt’s number. He stared at the contact in his phone. He couldn’t tell if he was dissociating into hallucinations or dreaming. Matt had given him his cell phone number.

_ Matt: so, you actually gunna text me or do I have to do everything in this relationship? :P _

Shiro choked on air at the phrasing.

_ Takashi: Sorry! I’ve just...I’m a little in shock? _

_ Matt: over having my number?? Or did something else happen? Are you okay? _

_ Takashi: I’m fine! I just...every scenario in my head of actually talking doesn't really end up with me having your phone number. _

_ Matt: With great power comes great responsibility. _

_ Takashi: oh my god you’re a fucking nerd. _

_ Matt: >:3c _

Shiro chuckled, Shaking his head.

Keith looked up at him with a cocked eyebrow.

“What?” He asked, staring at his brother suspiciously.

“Matt’s a nerd.” Shiro replied. It came out as more of a dreamy sigh than a statement of fact.

Keith’s eyes narrowed.

“Matt?” Lance piped up, exchanging eye a look with Keith.

“Matt’s the name of  _ loverboy _ .” Keith told him. The inflexion meant something to the two of them. They were having a full conversation with their eye contact, not that Shiro could be bothered to decipher it.

“Oh...interesting,” Lance drawled out the word, as though he were putting pieces of a puzzle together. And with that he turned around, not facing Shiro any longer.

Odd behavior but the two of them were always weird.

Keith went back to writing the day’s specials on the chalkboard, pointedly avoiding his brother’s inquisitive gaze.

“What? What’s so weird about his name being Matt?” Shiro asked, voice more accusatory than he’d meant for it to be.

“Nothing!” Lance jumped up, voice too loud for the small coffee shop. “Nothing at all! It’s a perfectly normal name for a perfectly normal guy who could be anyone!” Keith whipped his head around to give Lance a pointed glare, shutting him up.

Shiro sighed, rubbing at the bridge of his nose before giving up and walking back to his office. He didn't have the energy to deal with those two.

\---

_ Keith: PIDGE _

_ Pidge: Keith?? _

_ Keith: I have a favor to ask _

_ Pidge: Oh boy. This is gunna be good. _

_ Keith: I need you, to get me the name of the guy your brother’s been talking to online. _

_ Pidge: … _

_ Pidge: ...Do I want to know? _

_ Keith: it’s uRGENT _

_ Pidge: OKAY! Geez! I’ll get you the damn name. Don't get your mullet in a twist. _

_ Keith: His mullet is definitely twisted, thank you very much. _ _   
_ __ _ -Lance _

_ Pidge: what on god’s green planet does that even mean? _

_ Keith: IDK! NAME! _

Pidge sighed, shoving her phone into the front pocket of her hoodie.

“Matt. My favorite brother. Beautiful nerd. Smartest person alive-” Matt cut her off with a glare from over the top of his glasses.

“What do you want?” He asked, attention shifting from work on his laptop to his sister. Pidge shrugged innocently.

“I’m just wondering how you’re doing.” She told him, smiling brightly. He could see through it. “You haven’t talked about hot online guy recently.” Pidge knew she’d struck something as his face flushed.

“You told me, and I quote,  _ Hearing my brother sound like a lovestruck idiot makes me want to poke my eyeballs out _ .” Matt gave her an unamused look. Pidge rolled her eyes.

“I was kidding! Tell me about him!” She turned herself on the couch so she was facing him, television program forgotten. Matt glanced at his work before looking back at Pidge, studying her face as if he’d find her ulterior motive.

He sighed.

“What do you want to know?” He asked.

“How’s it going? Is he cute? Where’s he from? What’s his name? How’s the sex?” Pidge smirked as Matt coughed violently and suddenly at the last question.

“You are a baby. You don't know what sex is.” Matt glared at her, stabbing his finger at her in warning as she laughed. She held up her hands in surrender.

“Fine, fine. But what about the other things?” She pushed with a grin. Matt made a noise of defeat, slouching into the couch.

“It’s going well. It could be going better, but he’s shy and I don't want to push him away.” He began. “I don't know if he’s cute. Part of not wanting to push him away. I feel like asking for a picture would be too much. Also don't know where he’s from. And his name is Takashi.” Matt finished, idly looking over his notes from work. After a few seconds of silence he looked over at Pidge. Her brow was furrowed in the way it did when she was thinking.

“Cool...cool. So brother in law material?” She asked, pulling her phone out of her hoodie. Matt gaped at her.

“We started talking a little over a month ago! How am I supposed to know that?”

Pidge shrugged, making a noncommittal noise.

“I don't know. Could have been an instant fully in love thing.” She teased, deadpan. Matt scoffed and turned back to his laptop, determined to finish his work with less interruptions now that Pidge had gotten what she wanted.

_ Pidge: Takashi. _

_ Pidge: mystery man’s name is Takashi _

_ Keith: OOOOOOH _

_ Keith: MY GOD _

_ Pidge: ??? Gotta spell this out, buddy. _

_ Keith: Takashi Shirogane. _

_ Keith: Shiro. _

_ Pidge: O H M Y G O D _

Pidge looked up from her phone, eyes wide.

“Matt!” Matt jumped at her volume, looking at her with a horrified expression, glasses askew. “You have to come to work with me and meet my boss!” She insisted, expression wild and mildly terrifying. Matt sighed, pulse still coming down from heart attack level.

“I thought I was never allowed near Voltron, so I don’t embarrass you.” Matt replied, throwing her words back at her from when she’d first been hired.

“Yes. But now I need you to come and embarrass me.” Matt gave her a skeptical look.

“What do I get out of it?” Pidge threw her head back and groaned.

“You get to meet my boss, you get to say hi to Keith and you get to meet the people I spend all of my time with.”

There was a pause.

“Your time is spent here, ‘cause you’re a fucking couch gremlin who eats all my oreos.”

Matt laughed as a pillow was slammed into the side of his head.

\---

“Is he coming?” Keith asked quietly, leaning over so his brother couldn’t hear the conversation.

Frustratingly enough, he got a shrug in response.

“He can’t be assed to leave his place today.” Pidge replied, keeping her voice low. Keith groaned.

“So when can he visit?” Keith asked, his impatience clear.

“Saturday morning at the earliest.” Pidge did her best to ignore Keith’s pouting. “He’s busy Saturday afternoon though so it would be a quick visit.” She told him.

Keith turned to her with a panicked glare.

“Today is Sunday!” He hissed, Pidge returned the glare.

“He’s a fucking biochemist for a division of the Garrison, do you think he’s just tossing around free-time?” Point taken. “I’m not gonna force him to come here!”

They both quieted as Shiro sent them an inquisitive look from the other side of the room where he was hanging the next week’s batch of local art.

His gaze turned suspicious as they both gave him matching innocent grins.

“Should I be worried about what you two are up to?”

Identically shaking of heads.

“I’m going to take that as a yes.”

Pidge cleared her throat, side stepping away from Keith.

“So...how’s your  _ boooooyfriend _ ?” She asked, leaning her elbows against the counter, beside the register.

Shiro sputtered as his face lit up an impressive red.

“He’s not my boyfriend!” He cried out, voice cracking.

“But you want him to be!” Keith joined in, grinning as only a shithead of a little brother can.

“I do but shut up.” Shiro pointed a finger at them. It was meant to be menacing but came off as slightly panicked and very flustered.

“Cute!” Pidge commented.

“Ask him!” Keith insisted, frowning slightly

No one was in the cafe this close to closing, so it’s not like they had any customers to keep up appearances for.

“I...I can’t do that!” Shiro tried, dejectedly walking over to join them by the register.

“Yes you can! Just ask if he wants to date you!” Keith replied, as if it were that easy. Hypocrite.

Shiro groaned, shoulder slumping as he shook his head.

“Guys, I really like him. I don’t want to give myself the chance to mess this up.” He admitted. Keith’s face softened in understanding. “I’m a veteran with severe PTSD, I wake up every night because I screamed myself awake. I literally have days where I can’t get out of my own closet because my brain doesn’t believe I’m back home.” The floodgates had opened, Shiro’s insecurities pouring out as the hurt filled his face. “Who would want that in their lives.”

There was a long pause of Keith and Pidge staring at him. It wasn’t the first Pidge was hearing of this, but Keith had witnessed it and had lived through helping Shiro with it for years now.

“You have to put yourself out there for good things to find you.” Shiro flinched slightly at hearing his ‘words of wisdom’ thrown back in his face.

“I’ll think about it.” Shiro muttered, all but stomping around the counter and back to his office. “Close up.” He told them as he came back out, coat and keys in hand.

Keith and Pidge shared a concerned look as the door slammed behind him.

\---

Shiro stared at his phone in the darkness of his room.

It wasn't even late yet, he’d just decided it was better to crawl in bed now and stare at the illuminated screen. He didn’t want to be anywhere that wasn’t his bed, especially not after his outburst at the shop.

_ Matt: I'm about half an hour out from meeting my boss’s deadline, and then can I call you? _

_ Takashi: of course! Looking forward to it! _

Shiro read over the text trail for what felt like the millionth time, it kept his mind from wandering.

They were really carving times out of their day to call each other before bed. An occurrence Shiro hadn’t dreamt of in a million years.

He hadn’t imagined that Matt would ever speak to him directly, especially reach out and ask for interactions.

Shiro jumped slightly as his phone began to buzz, a screenshot of Matt’s smiling face popping up on his screen.

He hit accept and brought the phone to his ear.

“Hey.” He answered, grinning uncontrollably, bad mood left in the dust.

“Hey.” Shiro curled in on himself in delight as he heard Matt’s voice come through the other end of the phone.

“How was your day?” Shiro asked, practically melting into his bed as Matt began to talk about his work.

“How was yours?” Matt asked after a tangent about his most recent experiment.

“Good. Even better now.” Shiro sighed, listening as Matt giggled.

“Cute.”

The two sat in their silence for a few moments, grinning like idiots.

“My brother and his friend are being suspicious.” Shiro told when he decided he wanted to keep talking. He decided against mentioning the second half of the interactions.

“What are they doing?” Matt asked, amused and curious.

“They spent all day whispering and it looked like they were plotting.” Shiro pouted. “Last time they got like this I ended up buying Keith a cat.”

“Keith?” Shiro could hear the furrow in his brow.

“My brother.” Shiro answered. Matt hummed in thought.

“Takashi and Keith?” He asked. Shiro snorted in laughter. It was a common question.

“Yeah. That always confused teachers who had us both.” Shiro told him.

“I don’t know, I think it’s cute. Kashi and Keith.” Matt sounded like he was smiling as Shiro sat up suddenly, coughing.

“W-what?” Matt could be heard giggling from the other end of the phone. “Is it okay if I call you Kashi?” He asked, voice a lot more shy than it had been the first time he’d said it.

“Yes! Of course!” A nickname! Matt gave him a nickname! Shiro’s heart felt like it was going to burst from his chest.

“Good, I was thinking about it today and it just sounds cute. Like you.” Shiro flopped back down, taking all his will not to squeal like a teenage girl.

Maybe Keith had been right.

Maybe he should be letting good things into his life.

Maybe…

Maybe fully pursuing Matt would be a good idea.

By the end of the night Shiro’s choice was made.

Matt was worth the leap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey yall! I'd like to just say I'm v flattered that people are reading and enjoying this. I wasn't rlly aware this fandom much less this ship's fanbase were still alive but I'm so v glad ur all here <3


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He was definitely staring at you, though.” Ezor elbowed him. “If it doesn’t work out with Takashi I think you should track down muscle man.” She teased. Matt rolled his eyes, ignoring the way his stomach clenched painfully at the idea of his and Takashi’s thing not working out.

Shiro woke up that morning with birds chirping and sun pouring through his window, muted by the grey curtains. He reached for his phone before realizing it sat on the pillow beside his head, a ray of light peeking through the curtains to cast a clear path to his phone. One notification.

_ Matt: Sorry I had to end the call before you woke up, Kashi. Work needed me <3 _

Shiro smiled sleepily.

8:00am.

Shiro had slept soundly through the night. He’d fallen asleep to Matt’s voice, which was perhaps the best sound in the world. And he’d woken up to a text from him, the best sight in the world.

Shiro couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept through the sunrise, not having been awoken by nightmares hours before the sun showed any hints of coming up.

_ Takashi: No worries, babe. _

He hit send before he could backtrack on it.

Matt’s reply came in almost instantaneously. A heart eyed emoji.

Shiro sat up with a smile, shooting back a kiss emoji.

If he was going to actively pursue Matt he was going to go the extra mile. Emojis and all.

Shiro opted out of work for the day.

He texted Keith, letting him know he and Hunk would be running the place.

Shiro stretched his arm above his head, unable to tamp down the smile on his face as he proceeded with morning stretches and the one handed pushups he’d gotten so good at.

Maybe he’d actually be a productive member of society today. He realized with pleasant surprise that he had an abundance of energy and motivation. Something he hadn’t felt since high school.

Shiro unplugged his arm, putting it on before rummaging around his room for jeans and a sweater. He looked at himself in his bathroom mirror for a moment, taking note of the reduced darkness under his eyes.

He looked alive. Not like he was going through the motions as a ghost of his former self. Not to say he would ever look as lively as he used to. But it was nice. He’d gotten too used to being a shell of a person.

He thought about all the places around town he’d never been to. The museum he’d never stepped foot in. The book store down the street from Voltron he’d never cast a second glance at. The park in the center of town with the pretty fountains where Keith had drunkenly told him he was going to propose to Lance in a fountain last year. The shopping strip Shiro had never been on because all of his clothing seemed to come as gifts or from thrift stores.

For the first time in a long time Shiro opened his apartment door, keys in hand and stepped outside with a purpose that wasn’t going to work or Keith’s apartment.

—

Keith turned around, phone in hand with an odd look on his face.

“He just...called out of work?” The words sounded foreign on his tongue.

Shiro, the workaholic extraordinaire, called out of work.

“Is he dying?” Hunk asked, an eyebrow raised. Keith shook his head. “Is he dead and someone else has his phone?” A shrug.

“Maybe he just went to the gym. It’s been a while since he went.” Allura suggested. Keith shrugged again.

“He cleaned out most of his schedule there so he could pick up more work here.” Keith told them.

The three stood in utter confusion.

_ Keith: are you okay? Do I need to call an ambulance? _

_ Shiro: I’m fine! Today’s a lovely day, though. Figured I’d go to the park and soak up some sun before fall hits too hard! _

The end of Shiro’s text was marked with an emoji.

“Oh my god he’s dying.” Keith gasped.

“Don’t be dramatic. Give me that.” Allura stepped forward to pluck the phone from his hands and read the text, Hunk looking over her shoulder. “Oh...yeah, he might actually be dying.” She grimaced.

“He’s fine.” Hunk shook his head, laughing at the two of them as though he hadn’t been the one to panic first. “Let him have his day off, you can interrogate him later.” Hunk’s word was final. They were not to bug Shiro. Keith and Allura nodded.

None of them actually knew what to do without Shiro there. Sure, they knew how to do their jobs but no one was actually looking over them.

It was a store being run by three 20 year olds with too much energy.

As if to make matters worse the store was completely and utterly empty. A singular student sat in the back of the store, frantically typing at her computer and grabbing a refill of her coffee every once in awhile.

Hunk was knuckles deep in Allura’s hair, winding her curls into intricate braids while she read her book, humming softly.

Keith had picked up a pen and was on his seventh napkin full of doodles. Lance wasn’t there to fill the silence, Pidge wasn’t there to cause trouble and Shiro wasn’t there to be an easy target for teasing.

“Come on!” A voice could be heard from outside. Keith’s head snapped up to see Pidge, dragging her brother by the sleeve towards the door of the store. He looked downright pissed.

The door chimed as Pidge opened it, pulling him inside. She didn’t bother to say hi to anyone else as she pulled Matt towards the back.

“He’s not here today.” Keith informed her, watching as she froze and slowly turned, pure ice venom in her gaze.

“He what?” Her words were slow and terrifying.

“Called out. Went for a walk.” Keith replied, too used to Pidge to actually be intimidated.

“Is he fucking dying?” She spat. Matt furrowed his brows.

“Pidge!” He chided. “Hi, Keith.” He finally got to talk. Keith nodded in response.

“Hey, Matt. Sorry my brother isn’t here today.”

“You have a brother?” Matt asked, tilting his head.

Keith and Matt had met while Matt was a teaching assistant for Keith’s freshman course, the two had become friends through tutoring, nothing of their personal lives had actually come up apart from when Lance and Pidge had crashed a tutoring session.

“Yeah, he owns the place.” Keith could swear he saw Matt perk up slightly.

“Your brother...who owns a café.” He muttered but it seemed to be more to himself than anyone else.

“Yup. Established the place with the money he got from the military.” Keith could see puzzle pieces sliding around behind Matt’s eyes. A brief moment of both excitement and panic shot through him, realizing what he was doing. Pidge looked like she’d won the lottery.

“Your...ex military brother who owns a café.” Matt spoke carefully, as though if he didn’t it would all crumble. “What’s his name?” Matt asked, he was good at pretending he was calm but Keith could see the rays of hope in his voice and eyes.

Keith paused.

“Shiro.”

Matt visibly deflated. Giving himself a slight shake of the head.

Pidge opened her mouth before catching Keith’s pointed stare.

Shiro and Matt may be idiots, but they had to figure this out on their own.

“Well. I have to go back to work.” Matt yanked his sleeve out of Pidge’s grasp and all but stomped out the front.

“Nice to meet you.” Allura grumbled, glaring after him before turning to Keith and Pidge.

“Matt and Shiro have been talking online but they don’t know it’s each other and Matt’s too scared of pushing Shiro away by asking about him and Shiro gave Matt his first name instead of his nickname.” Pidge blurted.

There was a long silence as everyone mulled over the information.

“Keith, what the fuck!” Was the next thing out of Allura’s mouth, smacking him in the arm with her book.

—

“She means her best.” Shiro laughed quietly, phone held between his shoulder and ear as he cooked himself dinner.

“Yeah but like...I’ve told her about you! A lot!” Matt sounded distressed. Shiro felt for him, but the whole situation was pretty funny.

“Yeah?” He prodded.

“Yeah! I don’t want to meet her ‘hot boss’ and I don’t know why she thinks I would!” There was a rustling sound as Matt presumably flopped onto a couch or bed.

“And why would my existence make you not want to meet hot guys?” Shiro asked, a slight smirk on his face.

He bit his lip to contain laughter as Matt sputtered.

“Asshole!”

There was a moment of silence.

“I...I really like you, Kashi.” Matt admitted. Shiro’s phone almost fell as he froze. “More than I probably should from how long we’ve been talking. But...I still do.”

“You... _ really _ ?” Shiro asked. Not the best response, but he was too surprised to think about it.

“Yes...is that bad?” Matt asked, suddenly uncertain.

“No! No that’s amazing!” Shiro replied, wracking his brain for a good way to confess his own feelings. “I really like you too! I was hoping it wasn’t one-sided but I didn’t want to assume, you know?” He rambled. Matt’s laughter felt like a wave of calm.

“I’m glad we’re on the same page.” Matt’s voice was teasing. Shiro rolled his eyes.

“Hey, it’s not everyday I get amazingly attractive guys getting crushes on me. Let me have this.” Shiro laughed, flipping his badly made dinner omelet.

“I’ll let this one slide.” Matt mocked. “But only because I’m so hot your mind must be completely blown.” He snickered.

“Hey! My mind is utterly blown!” Shiro played along.

“That won’t be the only thing blown.” Matt’s voice barely came through the speaker of Shiro’s phone.

He coughed, wooden spoon clattering against the counter.

“What?” He croaked out.

Matt was outright howling with laughter on the other side of the phone, legs kicking into the air as he clutched his stomach at Shiro’s reaction.

“Has that not been on your mind at all?” He wheezed through his laughter.

“W-Well I wasn’t going to tell you about it!” Shiro clutched the side of the counter, face red.

“Why not?” Matt sat up on his bed.

“Because I’m an awkward piece of shit who can barely vocalize that I find you attractive much less anything relating to sexual encounters!” Shiro scooped his halfway burnt omelet onto a plate, turning off the stove so he wouldn’t start a fire in his distracted state.

“Well, I think you should tell me about them!”

Shiro gawked at his phone.

“What…” his voice was weak. His gay was going to kill him if Matt didn’t do it first.

“I said. I think you should tell me about them.” Matt replied. “I want to hear about them.”

“Y-you do?” Shiro could barely find his voice. Matt made a hum of affirmation. Burnt omelet be damned. Shiro had more important things to focus on. “What do you want to hear about?” He asked, uncertain.

“Things that run through your head. Scenarios. What you want to do. What you think about doing. Those.” Matt replied, Shiro could hear him smiling. “Tell me, Kashi. I wanna know.” His voice came out in a purr, making Shiro’s knees weak. He leaned against the counter to keep himself upright.

“Well...fuck…” he thought, jumping on the first image that came to mind. “You always look so good riding toys...I want to know how you’d look riding me.” Shiro had to force the words out as his face burned with embarrassment. He held his breath as he waited for Matt’s reply.

“Oooh, I could have a lot of fun with that.” Matt sounded leagues less embarrassed than Shiro. “You think you’d be down for me pinning your hands while I ride you?”

Shiro screwed his eyes shut, laboring his breath.

“Fuck yeah.” He replied.

“Bet you’ll sound even cuter in person than you do now.”

Shiro chose not to comment on the wording, making it sound inevitable rather than a fantasy. Shiro mumbled into his hand, whining when Matt laughed and asked him to speak up.

“I’m gonna fall over and die.” He complained into the phone.

Matt giggled in response.

“Kashi, baby. Please don’t fall over and die.” How could Shiro say no to that.

Shiro whimpered again, shakily making his way to his room where he ungraciously fell onto his bed.

“I fell over. But I’m not dead.” He told Matt.

“That’s good news.” Matt teased.

There was a heavy pause.

“So do you want to tell me more, Kashi?” Matt asked. Shiro bit his lip.

“I want...god, I want everything.” He closed his eyes. Matt huffed out a breath in amusement.

“Everything? I can definitely work with that.” Matt teased. “How do you feel about ribbons?” He asked. “I’ve always preferred it to rope. I’m sure you’ll love it.” Shiro gulped.

“I’m okay with ribbons.” He managed to croak out the words.

“I’m guessing your favorite color is purple...so you may have a purple ribbon surprise in your future.”

Shiro felt his soul depart from his body.

“Wha-really!” He asked, dumbfounded.

“Not going to tell you what it is though.” He groaned as Matt chuckled.

“Be a good boy and wait it out, Kashi.” Matt teased.

Shiro had good reason to believe the red in his face would never leave.

—

“You’re...chipper.” Keith looked Shiro up and down with suspicion.

“Yup!” Shiro nodded as he grabbed his coat.

“And you’re leaving work early…” Keith’s eyes narrowed as he examined his older brother. “Who are you and what have you done with Shiro?”

“CLONE!” Lance called out from the cashier. “He’s a clone!” Shiro shot him an unamused look. “Hashtag not my Shiro!” Keith snorted at that one.

“I’d argue sleeper agent.” Hunk joined in.

“Sleeper agent?”

“Yeah! Think about it, guy like Shiro comes at you throwing punches with a glowy hand? What’re you supposed to do about that?”

“Die, I guess.”

“Wait why would his hand be glowing?” Keith, asking the real questions.

“That anime fightin’ magic.”

“Precisely! Thank you, Lance. He gets it.”

Shiro cleared his throat, making all three of them jump.

“I’m going to check out the bookstore by the park.” He told them, looking between the three before turning to walk out, not wanting to deal with the conversation any longer than he had to.

He’d walked to work that day, so he was walking through town. It was nice exercise. Not that Shiro needed it. The fresh air cleared his head and the cold kept him alert.

He’d been sleeping better, still awoken by the occasional nightmare but they were better now, and more often than not Matt was on the other end of the phone in seconds if not already.

They’d taken to falling asleep with the phone call going. It helped Shiro to know that there was someone there and Matt claimed it made him feel less lonely.

Shiro stood on the opposite of the park from the bookstore, waiting for the walk light to turn green when he heard it. Laughter that sounded like bells of heaven. Like everything good in Shiro’s life rolled into one noise. Like home.

He whipped his head around, searching for the source before seeing a pair of people walking towards him on the street.

The woman had square glasses and her ponytail was dyed a hot pink. She wore a leather jacket, high-waisted jeans and a bright blue blouse.

But she wasn’t the one that Shiro was staring at.

His brown hair was pulled into a half ponytail, locks of hair falling out to frame his face, his round glasses sat exactly where they usually did on the bridge of his nose.

He was wearing  _ the _ sweater. The lavender sleeves rolled up around his elbows and a pastel blue button up underneath it.

The two stopped next to Shiro, waiting for the same light.

“And then, I swear to god it was the cutest thing, he goes ‘I wanna smooch you’. And I was trying so hard not to laugh ‘cause I didn’t want to wake him up!” The woman threw her head back laughing.

Shiro flushed. Matt didn’t tell him he’d been talking in his sleep over phone calls.

“He sounds amazing!”

“He is!” Their voices faded as they crossed the street, Shiro rooted to his spot. He watched them leave with wide eyes and found he couldn’t bring himself to move until after they’d turned a corner and were out of sight.

His phone nearly hit the concrete in his haste to get it.

—

“I swear to all hell and back he was checking you out.” Ezor insisted, looking back over her shoulder despite the man in question being out of eyesight.

“Nope.”

“He was full stop gawking at you.”

Matt shook his head.

“That guy was the definition of out of my league. He looked like he could bench press Zethrid.” Matt argued.

He’d been attractive. Ridiculously attractive, actually.

His white bangs were the first thing that drew attention to him. They obviously weren’t dyed, which gave an air of mystery about him. The scar across his nose and cheeks didn’t take away from it either.

He’d been tall, a good head and a half taller than Matt, and built like a brick house. Matt was pretty sure his bicep was the size of Matt’s head.

“He was definitely staring at you, though.” Ezor elbowed him. “If it doesn’t work out with Takashi I think you should track down muscle man.” She teased. Matt rolled his eyes, ignoring the way his stomach clenched painfully at the idea of his and Takashi’s  _ thing _ not working out.

Ezor’s attention was caught by an item in the window of a shop as Matt’s phone buzzed.

_ Takashi: I don’t want this to sound creepy because I swear this isn’t how I mean it. But I think I just saw you. Like...in person, on the street. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm uploading this a day early cuz I will be busy tomorrow and I'd rather update a day early than a day late...  
> bUT UH THIS IS ONE OF MY FAV CHAPTERS AND WE'RE GETTING TO MY FAV BITS


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A dramatic collision and a first date

Matt was sprinting before he could actually tell his body to move. He was sprinting down the blocks he’d just walked and back to the intersection. His phone was still buzzing but he didn’t look at it.

His eyes focused on the man frantically typing into his phone, white streak of hair in his eyes.

“Kashi?” Matt called out before he could stop himself. The man froze before looking up at Matt.

Over the pounding in his ears Matt couldn’t hear anything. But he saw his name on the man’s lips, the panicked look in his face and the way he clutched his phone for dear life.

People around them watched as Matt threw himself at the man, arms winding around him as he buried his face in the other’s neck.

Shiro, caught off guard, found himself falling. His ass hit the pavement but he found he couldn’t really care as he clutched to Matt as though he’d slip through his fingers.

The world moved in slow motion as the two hit the ground, laughing.

“I can’t believe it. You’re right here!” Matt pulled away from him, beaming with excitement. “Do- do you live in town.” Shiro nodded, still unable to bring himself to speak. He was staring at Matt with wide, wonder-filled eyes. Matt went right back to burying his face in Shiro’s neck.

“So...I’m a little lost. What’s going on?” Ezor asked, catching up to Matt.

Their bubble popped. Matt had tackled Shiro in the middle of a sidewalk between the park and the shopping district.

“Oh! Shit!” Matt scrambled to stand up, offering Shiro a hand. Shiro took it and pulled himself up, neither of them let the other’s hand go when they were both standing. “Ezor, this is Takashi.”

Shiro held up his right hand in a small wave. Ezor looked him up and down with an appreciative glance.

“Well that works out pretty well.” She gave Matt a smile. “I’m going to go meet up with Acxa and tell her what happened. You two have fun.” Ezor smirked, waving before backing away. Matt and Shiro shared a look, faces red and eyes wide.

“Do...uh...You want to grab some coffee or lunch or something?” Shiro asked hesitantly.

\---

“So you own Voltron…” Matt squinted at him, stirring the straw in his milkshake. Shiro nodded, he’d found himself talking less to make sure he didn’t blurt out anything embarrassing or stutter. “Which makes Keith Kogane your little brother.” Another nod. “Which makes you my sister’s boss.”

“Wait what.” Shiro coughed.

“That means you’re the hot boss Pidge has been trying to introduce me to.” he chuckled softly. “Wow, okay now I regret not going to work with her.”

“If I had known you were Pidge’s brother I would have told you to come in.” Shiro joined in the laughter.

“How did you not?” Matt asked, raising an eyebrow and smirking. Shiro tilted his head in question. “We look so alike.”

“Sorry, but ‘Hot guy I have a crush on from a cam show site’ isn’t really on my mind when I look at your sister.” Shiro shrugged before taking a sip of his own drink. Matt paused before bursting into laughter.

“That’s a really good point!”

The two had been sitting in a diner down the street from where they’d collided. Neither had been hungry enough for a full meal so they had decided to split a plate of fries. Matt had gotten a vanilla milkshake while Shiro had ordered chocolate.

Shiro could have sworn he’d felt gentle nudges against his shins, Matt smiling wider when Shiro’s attention diverted.

“So, this is a date, right?” Matt asked, elbows rested against the table. Shiro snapped his attention to Matt.

“I...Fuck, I hope so.” He blurted. Matt giggled behind his own hand, nudging the toe of his shoe at the side of Shiro’s calf.

“I’m glad we’re on the same page with this. I was really hoping it was a date.”   
“Because...you want to date me?”

“I was under the impression that I made that abundantly clear.” Matt quirked an eyebrow. Shiro snorted quietly. He had definitely noticed, even with his insecurities and self doubt Matt’s interest had been clear as a bell. “Because if I hadn’t…” Matt paused, reaching over to take Shiro’s hand in his. “I want to date you.”

“I’m glad.” Shiro nodded.

“So we’re dating.” Matt affirmed.

“I suppose we are.”

The two grinned at each other in silence, fingers still entwined.

The two walked through the park hand in hand, watching the leaves fall from the trees and onto the sidewalk. Shiro learned that, adorably enough, Matt would make a point to stop and stomp on piles of dried leaves, looking up with a grin when they made a satisfying crunch and pouting when they didn’t.

Fuck, Shiro was so far gone.

“So Keith told me your name is Shiro.” Matt turned to him suddenly, looking as though he’d been sitting on that comment for a while.

“Ah, yeah. Takashi Shirogane.” He explained. “Keith couldn’t pronounce Takashi for the longest time he kept saying Taki, so I told him he could call me Shiro. Then in highschool Shirogane was too long for a jersey so I just put Shiro and then it stuck.”

Matt cooed.

“Oh my god, Taki, that’s so cute.” Shiro chuckled, rolling his eyes.

“It was cute until the guys in the football team heard it.”

Matt shook his head, swinging their hands between them.

“What highschool did you go to?”

“Defenders high. The douchiest highschool name.”

Matt let out a guffaw.

“Better than the Rebels.”

“Of course better than the Rebels, fuck those guys.” Shiro laughed as Matt gave him a faux offended look.

The two stopped to sit on a bench along the walkway. Matt leaned into Shiro’s side, pulling their hands up so he could watch his thumb trace over the knuckles on Shiro’s hand.

“As far as first dates go…” Matt began. “How would you rate this?”   
“Out of?”

“Ten”

“Thirty seven.”

Matt gave him a look, eyebrows raised.

“Oh wow, high praises from Adonis himself.” Matt nudged him with his elbow. Shiro scoffed.

“I don’t know enough about mythology to respond to that.” He admitted. Matt laughed quietly, turning his head into Shiro’s shoulder.

“For the record, this is a pretty great date.” he murmured, smiling into Shiro’s arm when the hand entwined with his lightly squeezed in response.

\---

“So you just...invited him to movie night?” Keith asked, raising an eyebrow. Shiro shrugged, moving past him.

“Seriously? Right in front of Keith’s salad?” Lance mocked, his eyes never leaving his phone.

“I mean, Pidge was coming anyways, might as well invite Matt.” Shiro replied, opting not to engage with Lance’s memery.

“Yeah but I didn’t think you’d actually have the guts to invite him over here. I thought Pidge and I were gonna have to drag him by the ear.” Keith told him, stepping aside as Shiro moved around the kitchen.

There was a knock at the door and three heads turned to the clock. It was early. Almost an hour early.

“Hunk!” Lance jumped up, nearly falling on his face in his scrambling to the front door. “Hunk, my man, my buddy, my dude, light of my life, the wine to my cheese and the moon to my stars!”

“I’ve never heard him talk to you like that.” Shiro jabbed Keith with his elbow, whispering the teasing remark. Keith simply shrugged.

“Our love will never be what he and Hunk have.” Fair enough.

The chattering from the front room moved closer, Allura, Hunk and Shay entering the kitchen and nodding their hellos to Keith and Shiro. The three of them stood shoulder to shoulder as they conversed.

Shiro had met Shay when she’d come into Voltron to hang out with Hunk. He’d seen the way both of them had blushed and brushed hands and avoided eye contact. He’d had to leave the room when Allura introduced herself to Shay and suddenly all three of them were a blushing, babbling mess. Luckily where Shay and Hunk were shy, Allura was more bold and headstrong. By the end of the month the three of them were dating.

The Holts arrived an hour after the trio. Pidge burst in while Matt lingered in the entryway, rubbing his arm self consciously.

Shiro grinned brightly as he saw Matt through the doorway, passing the rest of his friends to make a path towards Matt.

“Matt!” Shiro pulled him into a hug, Matt seemed frozen before practically melting into Shiro’s embrace.

“Hey Kashi.”

“Glad you could make it.” Shiro pulled back before taking Matt’s hand to drag him into the kitchen.

There were a few introductions as Matt still hadn’t properly met most of them. He stayed glued to Shiro’s side for the entirety of the conversation.

“Alright! Lance, order pizza, I’ll go choose the movie.” Keith said, standing up.

“Is it your turn?” Pidge asked skeptically.

“Yes because we’re skipping you.” Keith told her. She made a noise of offence.

“I’m deeply sorry Pidge, but I must agree with Keith.” Shay told her softly. “Your last choice was...bad.” Pidge crossed her arms over her chest, pouting. There was no use arguing if Shay sided against you.

Lance called in their regular pizza orders as everyone made their way over to Shiro’s living room.

There wasn’t enough room on the couch for everyone but Shiro’s carpet was fluffy enough that no one minded sitting on the floor.

Pidge claimed the armchair before Shiro could get to it. She stuck her tongue out at him as she plopped down, stretching her legs over the end.

Shiro shook his head before turning back to the couch.

Allura sat with Hunk resting against her legs and Shay cuddling herself up to Hunk in his lap. Keith had taken the floor in front of where he knew Lance would be sitting. Shiro bit the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning as he sat himself down on the floor between Matt’s legs. The other man made a surprised squeak before leaning forward and running his hand through Shiro’s hair.

Shiro sighed constantly and leaned back against Matt.

“What’d’ya got for us, Keither?” Pidge asked. Shiro hadn’t noticed she was hogging the popcorn bowl until now as she reclined in an attempt to catch a piece in her mouth.

“It’s a Norwegian documentary about hunting giants!” Keith said excitedly.

“Why do I get my movie privileges revoked and he doesn’t?” Pidge asked Shiro, pointing at Keith.

“Why do any of you have movie privileges?” Was Shiro’s response, giving them both a disappointed dad look.

“Shiro, you made us sit through Safe Haven while you cried.” Lance piped up, Allura bursting out laughing.

“Shut up! It’s a good movie!” Shiro defended.

“Do I need to tell you how soaked my shirt was from you sobbing after A Dog’s Purpose?” Pidge piped up, earning a snort from Matt.

Traitor.

“Shut up and watch the fucking movie. Stop ganging up on me.” Shiro pouted, crossing his arms as his friends laughed.

Matt leaned forward, resting his forearms on Shiro’s shoulders, his breath fanned across the top of Shiro’s head.

It was calming. More so than he believed physical contact could be.

Shiro fell asleep in the first half of the movie, his head lolling to the side to rest on Matt’s knee.

There was a unanimous decision to not comment on it.

Shiro never fell asleep during movie night. If he was bored he pulled out his phone or got up to move around.

But Shiro slept through Lance shrieking, the pizza arriving. He slept through Pidge throwing popcorn at him and both Matt and Allura jumping to scold her. He slept through Allura, Hunk and Shay calling it a night as the second movie came to an end. He slept through Lance telling Matt they’d drive Pidge home.

He woke up as the front door clicked shut.

“Shit, with that timing I’d think you were faking it.” A voice came from above him.

Shiro blinked, looking around sleepily.

“What? Where’d everyone go?” He asked, voice slightly slurred.

“Everyone went home.” Matt told him, carding his fingers through Shiro’s hair.

“Did I fall asleep?” Shiro asked in disbelief, tilting his head back to look at Matt.

“You did.”

Shiro hummed in thought.

There was a long pause, long enough that Matt thought he might have passed right back out.

“You stayed.” His voice was quiet and almost timid.

“I did.”

“Do you want to stay?”

Matt blinked at the question. He made a noise of confusion.

“The night. Do you want to stay the night?” Shiro clarified.

Matt smiled warmly, leaning forward to place a kiss to Shiro’s head.

“I’d love to.” He replied.

“I promise I’m not trying to pull anything. I’m too tired for sexy shit.” Shiro mumbled, head falling to the side again. Matt laughed softly.

“Come on, Casanova. Time for bed.” Matt pushed at Shiro’s shoulders in an attempt to get him to stand. Admittedly it was hard to get a near-asleep man to bed when he weighed what felt like nearly two hundred pounds of muscle. With the power of sweet words and ‘Kashi, please move’ Matt managed to get Shiro tucked in, his arm charging on his desk.

“Babe!” Shiro whined, sounding more like a toddler than a full grown adult.

“What is it, Kashi?” Matt asked, smoothing the hair away from Shiro’s face as he all but kneeled at his bedside.

“I know you’re gonna try to sleep on the couch.” He was frowning, trying to sound chiding but missing the mark by a mile. “Don’t. Sleep here.” He flailed his arm over to smack the other side of the bed. Matt let out a breathy laugh.

“Alright.” He stood. “Can I borrow a shirt?” He asked, realizing he was in jeans and a hoodie.

Shiro nodded and hoisted his arm up in the general direction of his dresser.

“Second drawer.” He replied, eyes already closed.

Matt was surprised Shiro wasn’t fast asleep when he pulled the covers up to climb in next to him. To his surprise he was immediately enveloped in warmth, Shiro’s arm wrapped around his torso, pulling him in while Shiro nuzzled his face into the curve of Matt’s neck.

“Night, darling.” Shiro’s voice was muffled. Matt bit back a grin at the pet name.

“Night, babe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heya! I hope you guys are all staying safe during this...V odd time lmao.  
> Your comments have made my entire weeks and have actually given me a lot of motivation for other WIPS i have as well as my original novel.  
> Hope you enjoyed, now that they've met irl things are gunna get even fluffier lmao. At this point all of the edits have been made and the final chapter has been finished so now it's just a matter of posting!!!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steps and steps. How does one accurately pace a relationship? Shiro and Matt have no idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one...feels like it's a lot longer than the other chapters but Who Knows ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> Enjoy the incoming nsfw lmao

Matt awoke to an empty bed.

The smell of coffee and bacon wafting through the ajar door. Matt groaned as his brain continued its process of waking up.

There was dip where Shiro had been, making Matt smile fondly and reach out to touch the other side of the bed

Matt sat up, rubbing sleep out of his eyes as he heard faint humming from outside the bedroom.

Matt crawled out of bed and made his way towards the humming, yawning as he stepped into the kitchen.

“Good morning!” Shiro greeted, bending down to press a quick kiss to Matt’s cheek.

With a sudden and not entirely unwanted intrusive thought Matt realized he could get used to this.

“Morning.” Matt murmured, trudging to the island counter and pulling himself up to sit on it, watching Shiro move about.

“You…” Shiro paused “You look good.” Shiro sounded like he was forcing the words out.

Matt looked down to inspect himself. Boxer briefs and Shiro’s t-shirt. The shirt was light blue, frayed at the sleeves and bottom with a hole in the hem of the collar. An old band shirt with the band’s faded logo imprinted on the front.

“You think so?” Matt asked, pulling at the collar. It was big enough to hit his mid thighs when he stood and quite frankly he was pretty sure you could fit two of him in it.

“I do. You should wear my clothes more often.” Shiro smiled at him, his smile only widening as Matt reached forward. He grabbed the front of Shiro’s tank top and pulled him closer.

“I agree.” Matt replied, loosely hooking his feet together behind Shiro’s back. Shiro’s left hand came to rest on Matt’s hip while the other lay flat against the counter beside Matt.

Shiro hummed in agreement, eyes flicking between Matt’s lips and his eyes.

“Can I?” He asked, voice low and breath ghosting over Matt’s lips. A small, playful smile formed on Matt’s face.

“I’ve been hoping you’d ask.” He replied before leaning forward to close the distance between them.

Matt had never appreciated the metaphors about fireworks and sparks flying when you shared a kiss with someone who was meant to be, it seemed cheesy and like a setup for failure.

But Shiro’s lips felt like home.

He smelled like being curled up on the couch with a good book on a rainy day.

He tasted like waking up at noon and realizing you had nowhere to be.

And shit, that was better than any fireworks could have been.

The kiss itself lasted only a couple seconds.

The two broke apart, resting their foreheads together.

Shiro and Matt grinned at each other, both barely holding back giggles.

“I’m going to finish making us breakfast, and then we’ll see about what to do with today.” Shiro told him, reluctantly pulling away and turning back to the stove.

“Sounds good.” Matt replied, biting at his lip as he unabashedly stared at Shiro’s ass.

They sat on the couch eating breakfast, Matt leaned against Shiro’s side as he absently watched the television.

Morning news was never appealing but it was a distraction keeping him from tackling the man next to him.

A distraction that admittedly would only last until they finished their food.

“So, I kind of assumed you wanted to stay for the day but I guess I didn’t really ask if you had plans.” Shiro admitted bashfully, turning his head to look at Matt.

“Nah, you definitely assumed right. No plans and no desire to be anywhere else.” Matt told him, propping his head up on Shiro’s shoulder and pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

“Well that’s good. I get to spend the day with my boyfriend-“ Shiro cut himself off, eyes going wide as he made a choking noise in the back of his throat.

They both froze.

“I mean-“ Shiro was, again, cut off but this time by Matt swinging his leg over Shiro’s lap to straddle him. The rest of his sentence was silenced as Matt grabbed his face and smashed their lips together.

“I- that- that’s not to fast is it?” Shiro asked as Matt covered his face with kisses.

“Nope! You just owe me.” Matt teased.

“Owe you?”

“Four proper dates and a formal request to go steady.” Matt replied. “But I’ll take an IOU.”

He pulled back to grin at Shiro and nearly fell off the couch at the pure starstruck look in the other man’s eyes.

Shiro’s movements were slow as he brought his hands up to cup Matt’s jaw, pulling him in.

This kiss was slow and deliberate, like they had all the time in the world.

Shiro’s hands fell to Matt’s thighs as Matt’s fingers found their way into Shiro’s hair.

They stayed like that for longer than either kept track of, lips moving in tandem as they pulled the other closer.

The loud and sudden chirping of a phone on the table caused them both to start, teeth clacking together painfully.

“Fuck.” Matt swore, covering his mouth with his hand as he turned to pick up his phone.

He looked at the display screen before promptly rearing his arm back and throwing his phone onto the chair several feet away.

He turned to Shiro, who was giving him an alarmed look.

“Pidge.” He answered the unspoken question. “She’s teasing me.” Shiro nodded solemnly.

“Keith’s probably texted a few times too.”

Little siblings. A pain in the ass.

Matt shook his head before his eyes widened slightly.

“Oh shit. It’s Saturday.” He realized. Shiro mirrored his look. “I have to be home by six.”

There was a pause as Matt picked at the collar of Shiro’s shirt.

“But I’m free until then.” He looked up at Shiro through his lashes. “Got any ideas of what we could do to pass the time?”

Mario Kart.

Matt jabbed his elbow into Shiro’s side, watching with glee as Princess Peach careened off the side of rainbow road.

“Babe, what the fuck!” Shiro cried out, pouting at Matt. The brunette simply shrugged and put down his remote as Yoshi passed the finish line, earning first place. “You can’t run a princess off the road.” Shiro argued.

“All’s fair in love and Mario Kart.” Matt replied.

“You’re evil.”

“True.”

“I can’t believe you killed Princess Peach.” Shiro slumped back on the couch, giving Matt a scandalized look.

“She’s not dead.” Matt scoffed.

“Oh, sorry Mario, your princess  _ isn’t _ in another castle. She’s fucking dead. Matt Holt killed Princess Peach.” Shiro had the worst imitation of toad but it still had Matt laughing.

“You’re so dramatic.” Matt leaned his head against Shiro’s shoulder as he clutched his sides.

“And you’re a princess murderer.” Shiro was laughing with him, remote placed on the coffee table and arm wrapping around Matt.

Shiro was finding that having Matt around was less like entertaining company and more like having a piece of yourself next to you.

The silences were never awkward and he never felt pressured to impress. Hell, neither even changed out of their sleepwear.

Shiro’s ratty sweatpants and his own too big shirt hanging off Matt’s frame was a sight he wouldn’t give the world for.

There was something to be said about the calm lull of letting yourself slip into love.

You didn’t have to dive in head first.

You didn’t have to have a rug pulled out from under you.

It didn’t have to be a crashing wave that pulled you under and bombarded you with fireworks as you gasped for air.

You could just simply exist and let it wash over you like a summer tide, warm and slow.

Dramatic kisses in the rain and chasing someone down in an airport was all good and fine on television, but Shiro found he’d never yearned for any of that.

He’d never wanted the hopeless pining or the whiplash spontaneity of the media's ideal romance.

The screaming and crying until a big final be-all-end-all kiss held no appeal.

He didn’t want the build up or the cliffs and valleys of emotions. He wanted the plateau. He wanted the reliable. The stable.

He wanted Saturday mornings playing Mario Kart. He wanted Sunday evenings of reading books in comfortable silence with fond looks and a quiet dinner.

He wanted easy hand holding and soft, sweet kisses.

He wanted Matt.

Shiro glanced at Matt, leaned against his side and smiling softly up at Shiro.

His brown eyes held the world of potential.

Maybe Shiro wasn’t  _ in love _ but the very real potential sat next to him.

Shiro leaned down, surprising Matt with a soft kiss against his lips.

Because what is potential if not the key to the future.

—

Shiro pulled up to the curb, taking a deep breath as he checked himself in the mirror, combing rouge strands of white hair back from his face and fixing the collar of his button up shirt.

With another deep breath he steeled himself, climbing out of his car and towards the front door of the brick building.

It was easy enough to find the apartment number and hit the buzzer.

“Come on up!” Matt’s voice came through the speaker almost immediately.

Matt’s apartment was easy enough to find with the “Holt” plate next to the number, the door swung open before Shiro even had the chance to knock.

“I’m almost ready!” Matt informed him as he quickly disappeared. “I can’t find my keys!” He swore, pulling up throw pillows.

Shiro glanced at the side table next to the door where a keyring sat with a handful of keys attached along with a spaceship keychain next to a UFO one.

“These keys?” Shiro asked, picking them up and jingling them. Matt froze.

“Those keys.” He shook his head at himself as he plucked the keys from Shiro’s fingers. “I’m a little scatterbrained today.” He explained with a shy smile before standing on his toes to press a greeting kiss to Shiro’s lips.

“You look good.” Shiro told him, looking him up and down. His maroon sweater’s sleeves were pulled up to his elbows, the cuffs of his grey button up shirt folded over, same with the collar.

“So do you.” Matt stepped back slightly to blatantly give Shiro a once over. “It’s our first formal date. Figured I should try to impress you.” He smiled warmly.

“You don’t need to impress me.” Shiro returned the smile.

Matt chuckled quietly as he pulled the door shut behind him, locking it up.

“Well excuse me for going the extra mile.”

“Extra mile to what?” Shiro barked out a laugh. He was already Matt’s. There was nothing more to gain from him.

“To get in those slacks.” Matt tossed a smirk over his shoulder as he made his way down the hall, leaving Shiro gaping at him.

Shiro sped up to catch up with him. It was now or never with starting the date off smoothly. He could do this. He could be suave. He’d watched Lance try to woo Keith for years, he could do this.

“You already have VIP access, babe.”

Shit.

Matt stopped walking, a loud snort of a laugh seemed to rip itself from his chest.

“What?” He asked, turning to face Shiro as his shoulders shook with laughter.

“That was bad.”

“Very.”

“Lesson learned.” Shiro nodded, face hot as he continued walking, only stopping when he reached the elevator.

Matt caught up, tugging on the shoulder of his shirt to give him a short kiss.

“It’s the thought that counts.”

Shiro gave him a withering look.

“I used a Lance line.” Matt paused, hitting the elevator button.

“It’s the sentiment that counts.” He tried, giving Shiro a smile that served more as a grimace.

A ding came from the elevator, signaling it’s opening doors.

“So where are we going?” Matt asked, one hand entwined with Shiro’s while the other was shoved in his pocket.

“You know that place on sixth?” Shiro asked, rubbing his thumb over Matt’s knuckles. Matt whistled, eyebrows raising.

“Fancy.” Matt commented. “I know you’ve got money but damn.” Shiro shrugged.

“What’s the point of owning a business if I can’t treat my boyfriend to dinner.” Matt gave him a look.

“Wow. It’s like I’m dating my own sugar daddy.”

Shiro scoffed, nudging Matt with his elbow.

“If you call me daddy I will be so far gone we’ll both have whiplash.” Shiro joked. Matt barked out a laugh.

“Fair enough.” Matt said before they reached the bottom floor.

The restaurant was dimly lit, candles placed in the center of red clothed tables.

“This is fancy.” Matt tugged playfully on Shiro’s black tie.

“Too fancy?” Shiro asked, he shifted his weight, feeling nervous.

“Not too fancy. I have to admit I appreciate being wined and dined.” Matt shrugged.

“Shirogane, party of two.” His attention was caught by the host.

Matt turned back to Shiro with wagging eyebrows.

“A reservation?” Shiro smiled bashfully in reply.

The two were led to a small table in the back of the establishment.

Matt swatted at Shiro’s arm as the two of them giggled over Shiro pulling out Matt’s chair for him.

Shiro found that it was probably the best date he’d ever been on. It had nothing to do with the fancy food or the romantic lighting or even the wine.

The candle light from the table hit Matt’s face perfectly, making his brown eyes sparkle and illuminating the light dusting of freckles on his cheeks.

He smiled so fondly that Shiro thought his heart would burst through his chest and offer itself up to the other man.

The restaurant was quiet enough that the two could speak in hushed voices, holding hands atop the table as though no one else was there.

Matt’s foot brushed against Shiro’s calf as they spoke.

Their glasses were nearly empty and their plates had been taken away a few minutes ago.

“So...dessert or dessert?” Matt asked, taking a suggestive tone at the former.

Shiro’s tongue lodged itself firmly in his throat, causing him to sputter rather than answer. Matt’s eyebrow rose.

“Kashi. Breathe.” He gently squeezed Shiro’s hand. “Just nod or shake your head.”

Shiro nodded, face positively burning.

“Do you want to come back to my place?”

He nodded again. Matt smiled softly.

The brick building looked the same as when Shiro first pulled up. The difference was him. A new kind of nervous energy flowed through him.

That feeling only mounted farther as Matt beckoned him in, taking his hand and pulling him into the elevator.

Matt pushed into his space, pressing soft kisses against his jaw. Shiro let out a shaky sigh, holding onto the side bar for dear life.

He was dragged by his loosening tie down the hallway and into Matt’s apartment, passing a very alarmed neighbor on the way.

The door was locked with a click before Shiro found himself being pushed against the wood.

“Can I get you anything to drink?” Matt asked, trailing his finger around one of the buttons on Shiro’s shirt.

“I think I’m in the mood for you.” Shiro replied with a lopsided smile. A slow smirk spread across Matt’s face as he hooked his fingers in Shiro’s belt loops, pulling him towards a door on the other side of the living room.

“You’re in luck then.” Matt all but purred, kicking the door to his bedroom open and pushing Shiro in.

He was quick to remove his sweater and began unbuttoning his shirt.

“You having a sale on you? All clothing one hundred percent off?” Shiro teased, letting himself fall back against the bed when Matt rolled his eyes and pushed at his chest.

His mouth went dry as a shirtless Matt straddled him, undoing the top button of his shirt.

“Yes. And you are egregiously overdressed.”

“Oh, vocab me, baby.” 

Matt quirked an eyebrow at that one.

Shiro grinned innocently. Matt let out a short laugh before continuing with his buttons.

“Up.” Matt pushed at him until Shiro sat against the headboard.

Matt kissed him with bruising force, biting at his lips, swallowing every quiet noise Shiro made.

Shiro’s hands slid up and down Matt’s side, mapping out his skin as best he could.

Shiro paused as he felt Matt’s fingers pulling at his belt buckle. Matt pulled back, giving Shiro a look of both confusion and concern.

“Is this okay?” He asked.

“Yes! More than! This is perfect.” He paused again. “Do you mind if I, uh…” he displayed his right arm, wiggling the fingers.

“Oh! Shit, yeah.” Matt nodded, jumping to help Shiro detach it and place the metal limb on the bedside table nearest him. “Is that better?” Matt asked, smoothing a hand over Shiro’s chest.

“That’s much more comfortable.” Shiro smiled, nodding.

Matt grinned at him, leaning in to kiss him again, pulling his belt buckle open.

“Do you know how long I’ve been waiting to do this?” Matt asked quietly against Shiro’s lips as he pulled the belt out and tossed it somewhere off the bed.

“How long?”

“Since I first heard your voice.” Shiro’s eyebrows raised. “I didn’t even know what you looked like yet and I wanted to ride you until I broke you.” Matt's voice was a low growl.

He hooked his fingers in Shiro’s belt loops and began shimmying off his pants.

Shiro swallowed.

“Break me?” He asked, cheeks colored pink as he realized how hot that sounded to him.

“Yep.” Matt popped the p sound. His hand came up to take Shiro’s chin between his thumb and forefinger. “Ride you until you’re a whimpering mess who can only say my name and how good I make you feel.”

Shiro let out a whine at that, melting into Matt’s touch.

“Good boy.” Matt whispered, a wicked smirk on his lips.

Shiro felt a shiver shoot up his spine, making yet another involuntarily lewd noise.

Matt made quick work of pulling Shiro’s pants off the rest of the way before tossing his own in some corner of the room.

He let his hands trail down Shiro’s chest, coming to a stop right below Shiro’s stomach.

“You’re gorgeous.” Matt whispered, leaning in to press wet kisses against Shiro’s neck as he teased his fingers along the tops of Shiro’s thighs.

A small pleading whine fell from Shiro’s lips as his head made contact with the headboard behind him.

“What is it, Kashi?” Matt asked, giving Shiro an oh-so-innocent look. His voice betrayed his motive.

“Please. Matt.” Shiro wet his lips, watching as Matt’s eyes glinted with either want or mischief, at this point Shiro couldn’t tell. His own eyes were half lidded, lust taking over control of his expressions and vocal chords.

“Please what, Kashi?” Matt asked.

“More. I want you.” Shiro replied, voice different, even to his own ears.

“Of course, babe. Anything you want.” Matt grinned, leaning over to his bedside table and pulling the drawer open.

He sat back up with a condom and a bottle of lube.

He handed the condom to Shiro before lathering his own fingers in lube.

Shiro lamely held the condom as he watched, dumbstruck, as Matt reached down and pushed a finger inside of himself.

Matt let out a low moan, dropping his head onto Shiro’s shoulder while he worked on stretching himself out.

“Fuck.” Matt breathed out, letting his eyes flutter shut as he rocked his hips against his hand.

Shiro’s mouth hung open. He watched Matt’s hand.

“Kashi.” Matt whispered before bringing his other hand to gently push Shiro’s jaw shut. Shiro gave him an apologetic look from the corner of his eyes.

Shiro distracted himself with opening the condom, having to rip open the package with his teeth before rolling it on.

Matt popped the cap on the lube again, spreading more on his fingers before taking Shiro in his hand.

Shiro let out a shaky breath, his hand grasping the sheets.

“You ready, Kashi?” Matt asked, resting his forehead against Shiro’s.

“Yeah.” Shiro nodded slightly, swelling as Matt positioned himself.

They both groaned as Matt began slowly sliding himself down, hands coming to Shiro’s shoulders as he closed his eyes.

There was silence between them as Matt fully seated himself, wanting but almost bashful eye contact was made. A small smile from Matt and a shy blush from Shiro.

Matt was kissing him softly and sweetly. When he first moved they both gasped, Shiro’s fingers grabbing Matt’s thigh.

“You feel so good.” Matt whispered, almost scared to break the silence.

Shiro responded with kisses across his jaw.

“Come on, baby.” Shiro prompted in a low voice, giving Matt’s thigh a gentle squeeze.

With that Matt began rocking his hips.

Shiro let out a wordless cry, burying his face in Matt’s neck. He felt fingers in his hair as he gripped Matt’s hip, his own hips bucking up involuntarily.

“Kashi.” Matt moaned, biting at his own lip.

With their chests so tightly pressed together Shiro could feel Matt’s heartbeat thumping against his own.

He could feel Matt’s breath in his hair.

He breathed in deeply, taking in as much of Matt’s scent as he could.

He dug his feet into the Mattress, rolling his hips upwards at a pace to match Matt’s.

Shiro, in another moment of boldness, latched his teeth to Matt’s collarbone, leaving an angry red mark.

Matt whined, back going rigid as his fingers tightened in Shiro’s hair.

Shiro continued adding to Matt’s new necklace of marks around his collar.

“T-Takashi, I’m close.” Matt murmured into his hair. Shiro responded with a harsh thrust of his hips, using his hand on Matt’s hip to keep him in place.

Matt whimpered as he slumped forward, legs shaking and mouth hanging open.

He lifted Shiro’s head to kiss him, a sloppy and wet kiss.

He cried Shiro’s name into his mouth as he came, bringing Shiro with him.

Panting, with their foreheads pressed together, Matt let out a giggle.

Shiro grinned up at him, watching him, memorizing every curve of his face.

“I need a shower.” Matt’s voice was breathy and tired. “Care to join?”

“Hell yeah."  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please excuse 2018 me waxing poetic about falling in love mid-chapter lmao.  
> But yeah! The first actually nsfw scene with them! fun times, fun times!  
> Again, I'm so floored at the response this has gotten. I'm so flattered and overjoyed that people are liking this.  
> <3


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is just smut. Like it's legitimately all smut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I live in a city that's super effected by the current COVID crisis so we've been under lockdown for a while and I...can no longer tell which days are Fridays so this is getting posted much later in the day than I anticipated! I'm also working on camp nano so I've been distracted lol  
> Enjoy an entire chapter of Shiro bottoming I guess.

Shiro awoke in a sweat, sitting up and panting. He glanced around the room, breathing only speeding up as he took in the unfamiliar setting.

The figure beside him slowly sat up, rubbing at his own eyes.

“Kashi?” Matt whispered as he took in Shiro’s shaking form. Shiro’s heart immediately stopped thumping in his ears as he heard Matt’s voice.

Matt gently and carefully wound his arms around Shiro’s torso, placing small kisses against his shoulder.

“You’re safe. We’re in my apartment and you’re safe. I’m here.” Matt assured him quietly.

Shiro nodded, turning to embrace Matt, all but burying his face in the brunet’s chest.

“Sorry.” His voice was muffled. “Nightmare.” Matt nodded, running his fingers through Shiro’s hair.

“I know, babe. I’ve got you.” Matt laid them back down, whispering soothing words into Shiro’s hair while the other man calmed down.

“Sorry.” Shiro apologized again. Matt shook his head.

“You have nothing to be sorry about.”

“I woke you up.”

“I’d rather be awake and helping you than asleep while you deal with this on your own.”

Shiro fell silent, his face felt hot before he realized there were tears streaming down his cheeks. He was too tired to process the emotions that whirled through his head at such a simple but meaningful statement.

Matt glanced down upon feeling the wetness of Shiro’s face against his bare chest.

“Kashi?” He asked, slightly panicked.

Shiro clutched him harder in response.

“Thank you.”

Matt settled for kissing the top of Shiro’s forehead rather than replying.

He waited for Shiro’s breath to even out before letting himself fall back to sleep.

—

The next time Shiro awoke it was to birds chirping and soft light filtering through the curtains and splashing itself upon the bed.

He blinked, his eyes adjusting as he took in the view before him.

Matt’s face was illuminated in the glow of morning light, specks of sunlight reflecting themselves off his eyelashes.

Shiro reached up, brushing his thumb along the light dusting of freckles on Matt’s cheeks.

His hair was splayed out behind him like a halo, the light brown looking golden.

Shiro wasn’t an artist by any means but he swore if he was he’d have painted the exact scene to frame it and keep it forever.

The moment shifted as Matt’s eyes fluttered open, brown eyes focusing on Shiro’s face before his lips widened into a smile.

“Morning.” The word was spoken softly, as though it would shatter any silence.

Shiro smiled back.

“Morning.” He replied. He leaned forwards, pressing a soft kiss to Matt’s lips.

Matt, of course, didn’t let him pull away. He latched onto Shiro, taking advantage of their entangled legs, and kept him close.

“So…” Matt pulled away and gently pressed his thumb against Shiro’s bottom lip. “Breakfast? Or morning sex and then breakfast.”

Shiro blinked, processing the question. He let out a quiet snort.

“You’re insatiable.” He bit at the tip of Matt’s Thumb. “I think breakfast can wait a little while.”

Matt’s grin looked like it might split his face.

“Pardon me, I’ve got the hottest guy in the universe in my bed. I’d like to get in as many rounds as possible.” He paused as he propped himself up on his elbow. “Question. Would you be okay with switching it up?” He asked before quickly adding. “Not right now if you don’t want, I just thought it could be fun.”

Shiro raised an eyebrow at him, giving his verbal stumblings an amused look.

“I’m all for that.” He replied. Matt’s face lit up like Shiro had told him it was Christmas come early.

Shiro was honestly glad Matt had posed the question. He didn’t think he’d have had the nerves to and honestly, everything was more fun when you were flexible in bed.

“Oh fuck yes!” And like that a flip switched in Matt’s entire demeanor. His expression turned devious as he leaned over Shiro. “I’m going to make you feel so good, baby.”

Shiro’s face flushed as he fell back against the pillows, watching Matt crawl over him. Matt’s touch was light and teasing as he ran his hands up Shiro’s thighs, grinning wickedly as Shiro’s legs fell open in response.

Shiro let out a small noise, toes curling as Matt ran his fingers along the skin where Shiro’s inner thighs became his hips.

He was hard from just the teasing touch, squirming and grabbing at the sheets with his right hand.

He guessed it was because it had been so long since he was touched like this, or at least that’s what he was telling his pride.

“You’re gorgeous.” Matt purred, leaning up to latch his lips onto Shiro’s neck. The hint of teeth had Shiro keening along with the praise.

“Fuck, Matt.” He breathed, letting his eyes fall closed as Matt made his way down Shiro’s chest.

Matt let out a low chuckle as he flattened his tongue against Shiro’s nipple. Shiro gasped, hand going to the back of Matt’s head.

“Oh, you’re fun.” Matt teased before swirling his tongue around the nipple. Shiro opened his mouth to reply but found he could only moan.

Matt sat up suddenly, making Shiro whine at the loss of contact. The brunette was quick to reach for the bedside table, grabbing the bottle of lube along with a condom.

Matt paused, looking over Shiro.

“Fuck, Kashi.” He whispered as his eyes roamed over Shiro’s splayed open legs, his hand fisting the sheets and his face, taken over by a beautiful pink blush. “You’re so fucking beautiful.” He sighed, watching Shiro’s heels dig into the Mattress at the praise.

Matt smiled fondly, popping the cap to the lube.

“You ready, babe?” He asked, tilting his head.

“Oh god, yes.” Shiro nodded enthusiastically, squirming slightly.

Matt spread the lube along his fingers before carefully pressing a finger into Shiro, his other hand rubbing soothing patterns against Shiro’s thigh.

Shiro let out a loud breath, biting his lip, willing himself to relax.

He focused on Matt’s face, he was looking down at Shiro softly with a small smile on his face. Shiro returned the smile, suddenly unbelieving that he was actually this lucky.

Matt leaned down to press light kisses against Shiro’s stomach as he sank his finger in farther, crooking it and watching Shiro gasp and squirm.

Soon he added a second finger and then a third, spreading them and grinning as Shiro gasped through the stretch.

“Matt, please.” Shiro whined. “More.”

“Alright, alright.” Matt pulled out his fingers, reaching around for the condom and lube.

Matt unrolled the condom onto himself, taking his sweet time as he watched Shiro whimper and squirm.

“You’re teasing.” Shiro accused as Matt slowly stroked himself. He was ready and had been for several moments.

“You just look so pretty, Kashi.” Matt replied.

“Matt…” Shiro lolled his head to the side, giving Matt the best half lidded puppy dog eyes he could. “Fuck me. Please?”

Matt found himself unable to continue teasing when Shiro sounded like that.

“As you wish, Kashi.” Matt lined himself up, pushing his hips forward at an achingly slow pace. He smirked as Shiro grabbed at the sheets, back arching as he tried not to thrust himself onto Matt’s dick.

Matt took hold of Shiro’s waist as he pulled his hips flush against Shiro’s.

“How you doing, babe?” He asked quietly, leaning down to press kisses along Shiro’s collarbone.

He got a strangled moan and a thumbs up in reply. He chuckled against Shiro’s skin.

“I’m going to take that as a good sign.” A nod. “Good boy.” A choked whimper.

“Move.” Shiro’s voice sounded raw, rather unsurprisingly.

To that, Matt couldn’t deny him. He pulled back before snapping his hips forward, reveling in the cry that fell from Shiro’s lips.

He set a quick pace, fingers digging into Shiro’s hips as he fucked him, making sure to leave marks he knew Shiro would be feeling for the next week.

“Fuck! Matt!” Shiro resisted the urge to cover his mouth, knowing his hand would be swatted away. He let Matt’s name and strings of profanity spill out. He reached out, letting his nails take up Matt’s back and practically melting at the growl that came from the other man.

“You look so good like this, Kashi. You feel amazing. You’re so good for me.” Matt rambled, anything that would make Shiro feel even better.

Matt nuzzled his face into the crook of Shiro’s neck, whispering praises along with his name as he continued thrusting.

It wasn’t long before Shiro was desperately grabbing at Matt’s arm.

“M-Matt!”

“Yeah?”

“I’m close!”

Matt smirked lifting his head to rest their foreheads together.

“Come on, Kashi. You’re so pretty, you’ve been so good. You deserve to come.”

Matt’s words pushed Shiro over the edge, his back arching as he all but screamed.

Matt stilled above him, moaning as he came shortly after.

“Fuck. Kashi…”

Matt pressed a soft kiss against Shiro’s lips before pulling back.

There was a moment of eye contact before they both broke into a fit of giggles.

“You’re so loud!” Matt teased, pulling out of Shiro before they got too uncomfortable.

“Sorry!” Shiro’s words were muffled as he covered his face.

“Don’t be! It was hot as fuck!” Matt told him. “Now come on, clean up time.”

—

“So of this morning what I’ve learned-“ Matt began, Shiro watching him with a raised eyebrow. “Is that you take dick like a champ.” He continued on through Shiro’s choking noise of surprise. “You’re loud as fuck, like louder than I could ever dream of being. You have a praise kink. A really really big praise kink.” He paused to waggle his eyebrows. “And you eat bananas in your cereal.”

“One of those things is not like the others.”

“You’re right. I wasn’t expecting the volume of you getting fucked.”

Shiro sputtered again.

“Am I ever going to live it down?”

“No.”

There was a pause as they playfully stared each other down.

“So how do you feel about gags?”

“Matt!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was...the least edited cuz I hate reading my own smut so lmk if anything is wonky.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Relationship progression/backstory + 2018 era vld fandom jokes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rlly grateful to everyone sticking around to read this, I know this fandom kinda...dropped. But yeah...still means a lot to me

“Does it actually count as a double date if it’s a date with two couples, a poly triangle and me?” Pidge asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

“Fair. You’re uninvited. Now it’s a double date because everyone who’s invited doesn’t question it.” Matt replied, baring his teeth in an obviously fake attempt of a smile, challenging her.

“Fine! Whatever.” Pidge relented, rolling her eyes.

She paused, kicking her legs in the air from her seat on the sofa before she found a question.

“When are you gunna let him meet mom and dad?” She asked, grinning triumphantly as a pot clattered to the ground in the kitchen.

“I was avoiding thinking about that.” Matt replied from the other room. “We’re still kind of new and well…” He was quiet as he made his way back to the living room. “It’s been a long while since I’ve dated anyone. I don’t know if they’re going to go ice parents or start planning our wedding.” He grimaced.

“Oh don’t worry about that.” Matt gave her an inquisitive look. “The color scheme is teal and brown and the theme is calm domestic love, the ceremony will be on a ranch and then you’ll ride off into the sunset with the reception as some trendy hipster bar. We’re looking into crossings between Japanese and Jewish weddings.” Pidge replied, picking at her nails.

Matt made an offended guffaw, staring at her in horror.

“Who is ‘we’?”

“Me, Lance, Keith, Allura and Hunk.”

Matt opened his mouth before snapping it shut, repeating the process several times.

“Fuck you!” He settled on the reply before storming back into the kitchen to finish putting the dishes away.

“Love you too, Matty boy.”

—

The diner hummed with the steady noise of chatter throughout the building.

Greasy diner burgers were certainly up there on Matt’s favorite foods. A strong metabolism running in the Holt genes caused a beanpole effect, and for that he was grateful. Especially so when he was down half a burger, a quarter plate of fries and already on his second milkshake.

“Okay, okay, one time, in high school the cheerleading captain tried to ask Shiro out on a date, he’d apparently been planning it for a month, and Shiro got so red in the face that the medic came over to see if he was going to faint!” Keith grinned as the table laughed. Shiro huffed in annoyance, glaring down his brother.

Matt covered his face with a hand as he snorted in laughter. He turned to Shiro to poke fun at him but found the taller man already staring at him with a look that knocked all the air from his lungs.

One would assume he’d stop being surprised every time he looked at Shiro only to find Shiro already looking.

But the look of pure awe and fondness in his eyes had Matt floored every time. Matt made a small coughing noise of surprise as conversation around them resumed.

He could barely hear the words around him, focusing solely on the warmth of Shiro next to him. Matt leaned in closer, resting his head on Shiro’s shoulder, pointedly ignoring the amused look from Pidge.

Matt tuned into the conversation just in time to catch Hunk talking animatedly.

“We could do a name combo! Like brangelina!” Hunk looked too excited for anyone to shoot down his idea. “Hunayllura,” he pointed between himself, Shay and Allura.

Shiro realized with minimal surprise that Hunk had already thought about it and decided what the names were beforehand.

“You guys can be either Klance or Laith, I don’t know which one I like more.”

“That’s just a K in front of my name!” Lance protested.

Hunk shrugged before turning to Shiro and Matt. Whatever he was going to say died out as a look of horrified realization dawned on his face. His jaw snapped shut and he put his hands against the table, blinking owlishly before sitting back in his seat.

Matt sat up, biting his tongue to keep from laughing.

There was a long pause. Lance slowly leaned forward, steepling his hands in front of his face before turning them to point towards Shiro.

“Shatt.” His voice was quiet and careful but it cut through the silence like a whip.

There was another long pause as Shiro leaned towards Lance, face blank and voice low.

“No.”

“Understandable. Have a nice day.” Lance sat back up, drumming his fingers against the table as he pursed his lips.

Matt was shaking with contained silent laughter beside Shiro, trying his best not to burst out into cackling.

It was Pidge who broke the silence with a howl of laughter and soon everyone else joined in, unable to contain themselves.

“We don’t need a couple’s name.” Matt wiped at his eyes as he tried to catch his breath. “We’ll just be Kashi and Matt.”

Keith’s head snapped up, furrowing his eyebrows. Lance’s face split into a giant grin before Matt realized what had happened.

“Kashi?”

“Oh no.” Shiro slumped forwards.

Keith looked positively furious.

“You’ve been dating for like a month! You can’t do that!”

Matt gave him a questioning look as his boyfriend’s head was now slumped too far forward to address his own brother.

“Lance and I have been dating for two years now! You can’t just ‘ _ Kashi’ _ your way past us to the slot of cutest couple shit!” Lance nodded along with Keith’s words.

Matt snorted.

“I knew him as Takashi before Shiro. It was just the logical nickname.”

“It means sweets or dessert in Japanese.” Shiro muttered, his head still hung. Matt would have assumed it was out of shame had he not been able to see the tips of Shiro’s ears going bright red.

Matt blinked.

“Well. I didn’t know that.”

Keith made a frustrated noise, crossing his arms and pouting as he slumped back into his seat. He glared as Matt smiled sweetly at him.

“We will dethrone you for the cutest couple. It’s on, motherfucker.”

And with that Lance and Pidge were howling with laughter loud enough for the waitress to come over, asking them to keep it down.

—

Shiro’s eyes had fallen shut long ago as he enjoyed the feeling of Matt’s fingers running through his hair.

They’d put on a movie but it was only a matter of minutes before Shiro’s head found its way to Matt’s lap.

Matt worried at his bottom lip with his teeth, going over his earlier conversation with Pidge in his head. He hadn’t realized his hand had stopped moving until Shiro twisted to look up at him.

“Matt...Babe?” Shiro nudged Matt’s stomach to grab his attention, snapping him out of his thoughts.

“Hm?”

“You looked like you were about to pop a vein.” Shiro furrowed his brows in concern. “What’s on your mind.”

Matt sighed, propping his elbow on the armrest of the couch to rest his head against his hand. He sighed again, looking down at Shiro, before deciding it was best to verbalize his thoughts.

“Meeting parents. Yay or nay?” He asked, trying to act like his heart wasn’t beating out of his chest. Maybe it was too fast. Maybe Shiro wouldn’t ever want to meet his parents. He was once again pulled from his thoughts as Shiro sat up and turned to fully face Matt on the couch.

“I hadn’t really thought about it.” He admitted. Taking Matt’s hand into his own.

“So…” Matt trailed off, unsure of where he was going in his line of questioning.

“If you want me to meet your parents then I gladly will. I think I’ve met your father in passing when he dropped off Pidge.” Shiro sounded much too casual for how Matt was feeling.

“But you met him as his daughter’s boss…”

“Not his son’s boyfriend.” Shiro finished, nodding in understanding. “It’s up to you. I’ll happily meet your parents as your boyfriend.” Matt nodded. Something struck him as odd but his heart was still beating too fast for him to locate it.

“They’re cool with the gay thing, right?” Shiro asked, face in a small grimace. Matt couldn’t help but let out a laugh.

“Kashi, their daughter’s a trans lesbian. Yes, they’re cool with the gay thing.”

Shiro’s shoulders seemed to sag in relief.

“Then why do you seem so worried about it?” He asked, tilting his head.

“I don’t know it just seemed like it might be too fast.” Matt replied, rubbing his thumb over Shiro’s knuckles. He focused intently on Shiro’s hand rather than his face. “My family means a lot to me, and I was worried it would just be me pushing you to meet my parents.” He was bordering on rambling and he knew it. He clamped his jaw shut, forcing himself to stop talking.

“You’re not pushing me. I genuinely forget that meeting parents is a thing.” Shiro chuckled softly. There was a dark hint to it, as though it were connected to a sick joke Matt hadn’t been clued in to. He glanced up just in time to see Shiro’s eyes flashing back from something he’d never seen, to comforting and soft.

Matt nodded slowly.

“Not like, right now or anything.” He assured. He continued to watch Shiro’s face, trying to puzzle Shiro’s words with the unfamiliar emotion he’d seen. “What about yours?” He asked quietly after a few moments of silence.

“What?” Shiro asked, jumping slightly.

“Your parents. What about them?” Matt asked, voice careful and slow.

There it was again. The smile slipped from his face completely and his expression went dark. He opened his mouth slightly before closing it, jaw tightening as Matt observed the internal struggle.

“My parents are dead.” Matt was almost sure he’d hallucinated the reply. Shiro’s mouth had barely moved and it hadn’t been more than a whisper. “My mom died when I was four, and then my dad met Keith’s mom and died after Keith’s mom went missing.”

Grief. That was the emotion on Shiro’s face.

“Oh.” His shocked reply sounded lame, even to his own ears. “I’m...sorry?” He sounded unsure and hesitant. He knew what to do when Shiro awoke screaming, he knew what to do when Pidge curled herself up on his couch crying, but right then he was lost.

“It’s okay, it’s been almost ten years of just Keith and I. He’s all the family I need.”

“You raised him.” The words hadn’t meant to slip out but all the pieces were sliding together with loud clicks inside of Matt’s head.

“I did.” Shiro nodded, making steady eye contact.

“Oh my god.” Matt whispered, mostly to himself.

“Yeah. I was only seventeen and suddenly I was in charge of a ten year old.” His voice held a bitter edge to it. “I didn’t want Keith in the system and they didn’t want to use the money on us so they just gave me unofficial custody until I could legally take him in.” He shrugged. “I’m fine with where we’ve ended up but…”

Matt nodded in understanding, giving Shiro’s hand a squeeze.

“Well, my parents are going to love you so much they’ll probably force you into our family the second they meet you.”

“Oh?” Shiro’s voice was playful and had a hint of mischief. Matt swore he was getting emotional whiplash from this conversation. “And is that as a son or as an in-law?” He teased, flashing Matt an evil grin.

Matt’s face immediately went red. He yelped in surprise, pushing Shiro off the couch as the other man cackled.

“Don’t...oh my god! Fuck you!” Matt stumbled through his words, hopping up from the couch and fleeing to the kitchen, Shiro still howling with laughter where he left him.

He stood at the counter for a few minutes, downing a glass of water when he felt Shiro’s arms wrap around his waist.

“Sorry.” He didn’t sound the least bit sorry. “I couldn’t help it. You’re so fun to tease.” Shiro told him, smile in his voice.

“Asshole. Sending me into cardiac arrest like that.” Matt pouted but turned around in Shiro’s arms, back resting against the edge of the counter.

“Yeah but it was funny.” Shiro rested his forehead against Matt’s. “And don’t worry. I was joking. I still want to meet your parents though, with the way you and Pidge talk about them they seem like amazing people.”

“They are. Disgustingly in love too.” Matt made a face.

“Sounds sweet.” Shiro mused, pressing a kiss to Matt’s scrunched nose.

“Of course you’d say so.” Matt sighed happily, wrapping his arms around Shiro and resting his head against the taller man’s chest.

The two stood like that for another few minutes before returning to their movie.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meeting the Holts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uuuuh yeah sorry this update took so long. Camp nano hit and then shit went sideways but at least I finished a massive personal project.

Shiro let out a deep, nervous breath. He bounced from foot to foot. He’d been hyping himself up all day, trying to work off the nerves.

Even after a three hour gym trip and the longest shower he’d ever taken he was still wracked with anxious energy.

With another sigh he tucked the bottle of wine under his left arm to knock at the door.

It was a mere second before the door swung open, Matt looking as frazzled as Shiro felt. His maroon button up was half done, a singular sleeve pushed up to his elbow. His glasses were mysteriously missing, but Shiro had come to find that sometimes Matt just misplaced his glasses. Last time they were found inside the refrigerator.

“What are those?” Matt asked in a gasp, eyeing Shiro’s left arm.

“I don’t know if they’re flower or wine people so I got both!” Shiro explained, suddenly wishing he’d just asked.

“No no no! Stop being nervous! You’re supposed to be the calm one!” Matt exclaimed, turning to hop back into the apartment as he one handedly pulled on a sock. Shiro cocked his head, finding the image strangely endearing.

He kicked the door closed before carefully placed the wine and flowers on the counter.

“Here.” Shiro’s voice was surprisingly steady as he placed his hands on Matt’s shoulders. As soon as he felt the touch Matt stilled, tension melting under Shiro’s hands.

“Sorry.” Matt whispered as Shiro re-did the crooked buttons on Matt’s shirt.

“It’s okay.” Shiro replied, equally as quiet. He pulled at the collar of Matt’s shirt, stepping farther into Matt’s space. He could feel the other man’s breath on his face.

“I just really want them to like you.” Matt looked up at Shiro through his eyelashes. Shiro couldn’t help the soft smile overtaking his face.

“I want them to like me too. But I don’t think it’s the end of the world if they don’t.” Shiro admitted. He hadn’t actually thought these words until he saw Matt freaking out. “I like you, and I’m at least seventy five percent sure you like me too.” That got a giggle out of the shorter man. Shiro lifted a hand to gently cup Matt’s jaw. “That’s all that really matters. Your parents liking me is a bonus.” Shiro told him, now fully confident in what he was saying as he pressed their foreheads together.

_ I think I’m in love with you. _

The words went unspoken. It took every ounce of Shiro’s willpower not to blurt it when Matt was looking at him with those eyes, a breathtakingly soft and affectionate look swimming in his warm brown eyes. Shiro had been choking on the words for weeks now, struggling to keep them contained within his throat.

Four months since they’d quite literally run into each other. Shiro was going to be damned if he ruined it by blurting declarations of love.

Shiro was taken out of his head as Matt surged up on his toes, pressing their lips together.

\---

“Okay, okay. We got this!” Matt bobbed his head, trying to convince himself more than Shiro. They stood at the door of the Holt residence, a sizable mint green house with blue window frames and a white door. There was a weather worn swinging bench sitting on the porch to Shiro’s right, along with various potted plants sitting on the railings and hanging from the second floor balcony.

Matt held the flowers in one hand while his other arm looped into Shiro’s, the wine safely in Shiro's arm. He leaned in to press the doorbell, leaning back into Shiro with a nervous grin as the bell rang through the front room.

There was a series of loud thumping noises and the reverberation of the door rattling as something heavy collided with it. These noises were accompanied by the skitter of paws on hardwood and a few barks.

The door swung open, slamming against the adjacent wall, to reveal a grinning Pidge and a dog with a furiously wagging tail.

“Did you just...throw yourself against the door?” Matt asked after a moment of silence.

“Yes!” Pidge nodded, her hair falling into her face. She was wearing a light blue dress and a matching headband that did absolutely nothing to keep her wild hair down.

“Katie!” A woman, presumably Mrs. Holt, scolded as she entered the front room. “What have I told you about doing that?” Pidge groaned while Matt straightened up. Mrs. Holt turned to smile at her son, eyes widening slightly as she saw Shiro. “Come in, come in!” She ushered the two in, taking their coats and all but pushing them towards the kitchen.

“I, um, I wasn’t sure what kind of wine you like.” Shiro forced the words out. He wasn’t solid on adult etiquette but he’d seen his father and Keith’s mother give bottles of wine when they were invited to friends houses.

“That’s so sweet of you!” Mrs. Holt delicately took the bottle, placing it on the counter. “You must be Takashi! I’ve heard so much about you.”

“Good things, I hope.” Shiro chuckled nervously.

“Both of my children think very highly of you. I’m Colleen.” She elbowed him gently in the side, sending him a wink.

“Mom, please.” Matt groaned, he was placing the flowers in a vase, looking over his shoulder at the two of them.

“I’m just saying, I’ve heard wonderful things and both my children absolutely adore you.” Colleen continued on, resting a hand on Shiro’s bicep as she smiled sweetly at him.

Shiro couldn’t remember much of his own mother so he had little frame of reference for ‘a mother’s love’, and Keith’s mother tried her best but it was never naturally quite as maternally affectionate as the look Colleen was giving him.

“Oh no. High expectations. Thanks, Matthew.” Shiro hoped that the chime of laughter coming from Colleen meant he sounded charming rather than nervous. Matt made a snort of laughter as he turned back to his mother and Shiro.

“Please don’t intimidate him.” Matt pleaded softly, coming to stand next to Shiro. “Where’s dad?” He asked, looping his arm around Shiro’s metallic one.

“Oh, he’s in his office, let me get him.” Colleen jumped a bit, moving away from Shiro and towards a door off of the living room. “Sam! Put that down and come meet your son’s boyfriend.”

Matt huffed with quiet laughter, shaking his head, before turning to Shiro.

“You doing okay?” He asked. “They’re a bit much but it’s the Holt energy.”

“She’s nice.” Shiro replied simply, nodding. “The Kogane/Shirogane family is just two introverts so this is a little overwhelming.” He admitted.

Samuel Holt looked like a cartoon character. His greying hair stuck up in odd directions and his glasses were most definitely lopsided, bent at the metal by his ear. He wore a goofy grin and a set of goggles around his neck.

“Hun, please.” Colleen chided as she pulled the goggles off, grabbing at his white coat in an attempt to get it off him. “At least try to look presentable.” Sam laughed softly, shrugging off his coat for Colleen to toss back into his office with his goggles.

“Takashi!” He held out his arms, as though he were presenting a speech, as he walked into the kitchen. He gave Shiro a surprisingly strong pat on the shoulder. “It’s good to meet you again.”

“You too, Mr. Holt.” Shiro replied, his voice sounded small, even to himself.

“No, none of that. It’s Sam.” The goofy grin lit up his entire face.

_ Oh my god, this is what Matt is going to be like. _ Shiro realized with half a jolt.

“O-Okay.” Shiro nodded, his nerves firing up full force.

“Dad, you have mad scientist hair.” Matt gave his father an unamused look.

“It’s authentic!” Sam replied, turning his grin on Matt. “Takashi needs to know what he’s getting himself into.”

“I think if he’s willingly dating Matt he’s got a pretty good idea.” Pidge’s voice came from behind Shiro, making him nearly jump out of his skin with a small shout.

“Hey!” Matt’s exclamation of protest went ignored.

“Stop that.” Colleen chided. “Now, come, sit. Tell us what about you.” Colleen stepped forward to pull Shiro towards the island, sitting him down in a stool.

“Oh, uh.” Shiro twiddled his thumbs awkwardly in his lap. “I own and run Voltron, but you kinda...know that.” He trailed off. Colleen nodded, reaching over to place her hand on his hands.

Shiro was learning that this was a very tactile family. The opposite of him and Keith, who found an occasional side hug or fist bump as sufficient affection.

“Thank you so much for giving our daughter her job. She loves it there and she’s become a much happier person.” Shiro nodded along with Colleen’s words, letting them sink in.

“She’s a joy to have around the shop, she fit in really well with my brother and his friends.” Shiro assured her, mirroring her soft smile.

“I thought Shiro was here so you guys could embarrass Matt.” Pidge rolled her eyes, making a loud crunch as she popped a chip into her mouth. Matt reached over, hoisting his body across the island to flick her in the side of the head.

“So how did you two meet?” Colleen asked, an innocent enough question.

Matt was thrown into a coughing fit, falling against the island before standing to scramble for water as Pidge cackled.

“Um...work.” Shiro replied, unsure.

Matt doubled over once again, eyes wide as he beat a fist against his chest. He was completely red in the face but that could either be from choking on air or from Shiro’s answer.

Pidge’s chair fell to the floor as she toppled over.

Colleen pulled away from Shiro to scold her children.

He watched Matt and Pidge bicker, the latter still catching his breath, as Colleen exasperatedly looked to her laughing husband for help.

_ You could join this family _ . A small voice in his head whispered. And suddenly, that voice was a life jacket in a sea he didn’t realize he’d been treading water on.

That thought was a puzzle piece clicking into place.

\---

Shiro let out a long sigh as the car engine died out. His head hit the back of the seat with a quiet thud.

“I’m ready to sleep for a full week.” He murmured.

“That bad?” Matt asked.

Shiro turned at the tone of Matt’s voice. He found the other man looking out his passenger window, chin resting on his arm and his other hand gripping his jacket.

“Hey. Look at me.” Shiro replied, quiet but firm. He watched Matt’s shoulders fall as he let out a breath and turned back to Shiro.

He looked small. Scared and resigned.

Shiro lifted a hand to tuck a lock of hair behind Matt’s ear, letting his fingers rest on Matt’s cheek.

“Not bad. I think it went really well.” He told him, voice quiet in the still, darkness of the car. “Your family is really fun, and I have too much anxiety to say for sure but I think they liked me.” Shiro continued.

There was a long silence as Matt leaned into Shiro’s touch, eyes focusing on something out the window behind Shiro.

“They definitely liked you.” He finally said.

Another pause as Shiro gathered his words.

“Your face says something else.”

Matt blinked, wiping his face of emotions. He gnawed at his lip as they began seeping back in. He’d never been good at hiding his emotions, and it seemed Shiro made it harder for him to do so.

“I don’t know. Some part of me just thinks you won’t want me after meeting them.” He admitted, voice wavering. Shiro couldn’t help the pitiful noise of pain that came out.

“No. Matt. Meeting your parents could never make me want you any less. Why would it?” He asked, trailing his thumb over Matt’s cheek, catching a single tear as it fell.

“I don’t know.” Matt repeated. “They’re loud and obnoxious. You’re quiet and peaceful. You seemed really overwhelmed at dinner and they’re not ever going to stop asking questions.” More tears slipped from Matt’s eyes as he spoke, his hands coming up to gesture frustratedly.

“I had a part of me that thought you wouldn’t want me after finding out about my life.” Shiro told him, watching as Matt fell silent, eyes meeting Shiro’s with a questioning gaze. “I’m an orphan veteran amputee with massive amounts of anxiety, and PTSD. I sound like the set up for a shitty children’s show villain.” Shiro explained. “It’s taken me a long time to be okay with myself. And I know it’s not the same, but I figured that as long as I’m okay with me then you would be too.” Shiro shrugged. “I mean I still have massive doubts but…” he paused, scrunching his face in thought as he picked his words. “I don’t really think there’s a lot that could make me not want to be with you.” He finished, smiling at Matt.

He wasn’t the best with comforting or reassurances. The best he’d done was lay beside Keith in bed when they were younger as they grieved their parents, or a single awkward hug he’d shared with Pidge when he found her crying in the back room over something her classmates had said.

“I love you.”

The car was completely silent. The only noise to be found was a cat mewling from down the street.

Shiro’s shoulders jumped with a quiet huff of surprised, giddy amusement.

He felt his face split into a grin as he pulled Matt towards him, hands on either side of his boyfriend’s face.

“I love you too.” He whispered against Matt’s lips. He felt Matt’s mouth form a smile before pressing forward.

This, by far, was the sweetest kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still need to finish chapter 11 but hopefully it won't take as long to get up.  
> Thank you all so much for sticking around this far!


End file.
